The beginning of forever
by LeandraDeRaven
Summary: What happen if something bad changes everything? Are feelings enough to risk their ffriendshhip? deviating storyline from season 7
1. some things change

**Hey lovelies:) Here is my new story I hope you like it. Let me know what you think. Sorry that it took me so long to post it. But English is not my mother language. So it took me a while to translate it. I am also apologizing for all my grammar mistakes. But I hope you like it so far...**

 **all characters belong to Shonda**

Chapter I

Something changes (Some things change)

It was a long day in Seattle Greys Mercy West. Jackson had just lost a patient for the first time in a while. He never did well with this, as his professional ethics was to save lives and he suffered every time, like an iron hammer banging in his chest, if he were not able to.

He left the operating room, took off his scrubs and cleaned off the sweat from his forehead. Absorbed in thought he wandered through the corridors to his office. Suddenly he heard a 'Hey' coming from afar. When he looked up he saw April at the other end of the corridor. She walked toward him: 'Jackson, are you all right?'

She softly touched his arm and looked at him questioning and worried.

'Yes, I just lost a patient again, an Aneurysm wandering to the brain during operation. I know this can happen anytime and that I couldn't have avoided it, but I suffer every time as if it was the first death.'

He looked into April's eyes, a safe haven since forever. April's and his friendship had grown tremendously since the dreadful killing spree. She was always there for him, the brightest and sweet-naturist person he knew, firm as a rock. Her presence alone lifted him up. April was the sole real friend he ever has had, someone he could always count on.

She looked in his eyes and her heart saddened. She hated seeing Jackson suffer, she knew this pain all too well. "It is always hard... you ask yourself such terrible things like that happen...he is in a better place now... and I am sure you have done your best to save him... it was not your false." A ´light smile spread over his face. Somehow April always found the right words to calm him "How you can still have such power in you, while we have all these awful things that happen here and at the same time you can also give me so much strength?" He asked and put his arm around her shoulder. " I don't know. I just trust.. that all have a sense in life, even the bad things." She answered. Jackson put her closer to him and kissed the crown of her head. I am so grateful to have you in my life." He whispered.

"Me too Jacks.?"

" I wanted to go to joe's to grab some drinks. Do you wanna keep me company for a drink?" Jackson asked her.

" Sure I just gonna change my clothes. Would you wait here?" April answered.

"Of course. Take your time." He said and smiled.

"I'll hurry. I will be back in a minute."April said and hushed away. A couple of minute she came back. She was wearing a dark blue pair of jeans and a red V Neck Long sleeve.

"So lets go." She said and they were making their way to Joe's. As soon as they arrived they already seen Christina and Meredith sitting in the bar.

"Hey you both!" Christina greeted them.

"Hey." Jackson and April greeted back.

"Pretty boy and virgin Mary, come join us for a drink. " Christina suggested in excitement and held up a glass filled with tequila.

Jackson threw Christina an angry look and said:" I said don't call her that."

" It's OK Jacks. I am kind of used to it."April said. Out for all that they joint them.

" Hey Joe two glasses with tequila please for our virgin Mary and pretty boy over here," Christina ordered. By these words, Jackson rolled his eyes in annoyance. Christina took the fur glaces and handed it to them all of them. "lets see if we can get you drunk Kepner." Christina says. "It's not like I never been drunk before... "April protested. "Maybe, but I've never seen it before, so... " Christina toasted to April. "But I am only drinking one or two shots:" April said and took her glass

"Stop teasing her. " Meredith defended April. "I am not teasing her. I am trying to be a good friend, by showing April the pleasures of the world. You have to taste the pleasures of life though. One of them is definitely tequila. She toasted again " So take my help and drink, you too Avery. Cheers." They did as they were told and trowing back the shots. Jackson saw on the corner of his own how April was shaken by the bitter flavor of tequila "Urgh this stuff is awful. I don't understand how you guys could drink much more than one of it." April complained. She looked up to Jackson, who seems lost in thought. "We can sit somewhere else, if you want" She suggested softly. " No, no it's all right." He murmured.

"Oh you want sone lonely time together. It is OK: We already wanted to go to mer though. We leave you lovebirds alone" Christina offered and stood up of chair. She put 30 dollars on the counter "Keep the Change." She said to Joe and grabbes her purse. "All right lets go." Meredith said and put her Jacket on. " See you at work tomorrow Pretty boy, you look awful! Keppner take care of it!" Christina said and left the bar with Meredith.

"Whiskey Cola please... or... make two of it. Jacckson ordered. "You're staying, right.? Jackson hopfully asked. "Of Course I'll stay!" She squeezed his Hand. He took their two glasses Whiskey Cola, gestured to another table and take a seat with April. He took a big sip of his Whiskey. "This all sucks. I just wanted to help that woman... I wanted to give her a beautiful face again... I wanted to do something good... and what I have done? I fail and now she is dead! Jackson took another sip to drown his frustration.

"I know Jackson" April gently stroked the back of his head. She felt tears in her Eyes but she fought against it. She hated to see her best Friend like that. She wanted to take some pain off of him. " You will be fine Jackson You will save many lives in the future. For that I am sure. People Die. That is the risk of our Job and sometimes we can't do anything about it.

"You're probably right..." He smiled at her.

" Hey babe, can I buy you a drink?" a sleazy guy and inerrupted Jacksons and Aprils conversation.

"Oh thanks for the offer, but I still have one." April replied kindly. "Come on, just one drink, after that one please." The guy ask obtrusivliy. "I think I am only drinking one, but thanks anyway." She Answered "oh come on do me the favor!" The guy doesn't stop bothering. Don't you understand? She doesn't want a drink!" Jackson defend her. " OK OK I'm going." The sleazy blond guy said. And got a seat on another table. Jackson saw that the guy was still staring at them. " Thank you Jacks." April said and gently touched his arm "No problem Apes. " He smiled at her. April took a huge Sip. " So... enough about me, how about you? How was your day?" Jackson asked. Her face begun to brighten up. " Oh it was pretty lazy, only two trauma were coming in. but both are alive, so it was a lazy, but at least a good day." She said and took another sip.

"A beautiful day to save lives." Jackson cheers.

" To Tommorow!" April cheered and smiles.

Jackson noticed that the guy still stared at April " Did it often happen that you got molest by guys and they don't back off?" " No, not really. Why should they. I am kind of annoying and have a weird voice. I am weird. " She replied.

"Stop saying that! You're beautiful!" He said honestly.

" You have to say that. You are my best friend Jackson." April laughed.

" No, I would've also say that if I weren't your best friend! Because it's the truth." Jackson answered and looked into Aprils eyes. April saw something in his eyes, that she never seen before. She knew that Jackson cared about her. Of course... he is her best friends. But by the way he looked at her now... something changed. She couldn't explain it to herself. Confused she took a big sip of her Whiskey Cola.

"April? Are you alright." Jackson asked in concern as he notice her nervousness.

" Yeah it is nothing." She rambled. She downed her glass in one gulp.

Noticing her discomfort Jackson asked: " What's wrong Apes?" and touched her Arm

April stiffened by his touch. "Nothing...uh... I am fine... April assured. Suddenly she stood up from her chair. "I... I have to go... I think that was to much to drink I am feeling a little dizzy.

" OK I can take you home now." Jackson offered in concern. " No that is not nessesary. Really. You didn't even finish your glass. See you tomorrow." April winked.

"Than at least give me a call when you arrived at home."

"Sure. " She nodded got her coat on and left the Joe's.

April walked along the street. She decided to walk home, because maybe that woulld clear her mind. She took a deep breath. She totally overinterpreting. But she couldn't forget. How he looked at her. She laughed sarcastically "I really drank too much... I am phantasying that Jackson Avery had more than friendly feelings for me." She said to herself and shook her head. "Hey Baby you owe me a drink." She turned around. It was the guy from the bar. "Thanks, but not today, maybe another time..." She said. He got closer and April become uncomfortable by his presence. "It is not kind, that you knock me back." The guy complained. I am sorry if I upset you, but I really have to go home right now." She said. "Oh I have nothing against it to come home to you Sweety." He grinned.

" I have to get up early tomorrow. I have to go." She turned around and wanted to leave but he grabbed her arm

"Come on. I saw how you looked at me." He said, grabbed, and yanked her towards him. April whimpered and stuttered in panic. " I didn't want to gave you a wrong impreesion. I am Sorty, but I have to go now. Please let off of me." The guys breath smelled like wodka. He brutally kissed her. " Her eyes widened in panic. "Let of off me or I scream." She began to fight against him. "Oh I like it when women scream." He whispered and her right breast. Full of disgust and panic Apil Instinctly kicked and hit him right into his balls. The guy screamed out in pain and let go of her. April ran as fast as she could. But a few seconds later she was drag on the floor. " You fucking bitch." He laid over her and hits her in the face. April started to cry. "Please, no please" She begged and felt another hit in her face. He tore her blouse apart. April cried and prayed, god please no. don't let this happen. " Please, don't" She screamed and cried. "Shut up" He barked. And gave her another hit in the face. April felt how he wanted to open her trousers, but then he was suddenly ripped off of her. "Get off of her!"The pervert swine was dragged to the ground and punished by some brutal hits. April saw that it was Jackson. Then she blacked out.

Jackson was so full of rage. He coudn't control himself anymore. He hits and hits him. After he few second the was unconscious and full of blood. The dust of rage slowly went away. He had to call the ambulance for that guy. So he did and told them that they have to bring to mercy west. Then he realized that April still lays on the floor. He rushed to her and get on his knees. He was so glad he followed her. He had a bad feeling, when he saw the guy leaving the bar right after April, so he followed her. He had the right feeling and what made him furious. "April?" He ask. No reaction... "April please, wake up." He stroke her hair. Her eyes flickered.

"Jackson." She whimpered and started to cry.

" Sssh Apes, I am here now. You're save now." He tried to calm her and took her gently in his arms.

Aprils whole body was shaking and she started sobbing. It broke Jacksons heart to see her like that. He whispered calm in her ear and sroke her hair. I wa...as so scrared... thank god. You come. I was so scared... I scream... " She let out between some heartbreaking sobs.

"Come let me take to hospital Apes." He said softly. "NO!" She screamed "NO!"

"OK OK it is ok Apes but you are bleeding and you need a check up." He calmed her down.

"you ca do it Jackson... at home. I trust you. Please." Her eyes filled with tears again:

"Alright but at least let me carry you home." He said.

"That is not necessary, Jacks."

"No back talk Apes!"

But now she got aware of her nakedness and tried nervously to cover herself and started to cry again.

"Apes. Let me do this." Jackson whispered. She shook her head and tried to close her coat, but couldn't . He gently laid his hands above hers to stop her. "April. Trust me please. Let me help you. His voice cracked. He looked straight into her eyes. A single tear escaped of hey eye. Jacksons softly wiped the tear from her cheek. She saw in his deep trustful eyes all she saw was good, so she nodded. Taking care not to touch her inappropriately; He closed her coat carefully. She is so vulnerable. He thought. All he wanted is to protect her now... take care of her... He wished he could erase this moment, but he couldn't. He should have gone with her. He was his best friend. He genlty took her face in his hands and gave her a soft kiss n her forehead. "I'll take you home now and all is going to be fine again." He took her in his arms and walked to their home. She was still shaking, but snuggled at him. Jackson knew that Alex was at home now and hoped that he would open the door. He rang the like an obsessed. "Dude didn't you have keys? Alex askeed as he opened the door. Alex widened his eyes in shock. " What the hell... what happened. " Alex ask in disbelief and ggave them access to the living room. "She got attacked by some fucking asshole." Jackson explained. "WHAT? Son of a bitch. " Karev cursed. " Karev could you desinfective agent and some pledges? " Jackson asked.

"Sure i'll be right back. Keppner all is gonna fine"

Jackson leaned to April. " April you are home now. I am gonna take care off you. All will gonna be fine I promise. I an not gonna leave you. " He said She fearful looked at him but nodded.

"Jackson I was so scared... I thought he would... " Her eyes filled with tears again. "I am so sorry, Apes." He bearely fought the tears bah aswell and grabbed gently for her hand. "I shouldn't have let you go alone. I shouldn't... " He said his voice full of regret. " hey... don't say that... Itt wasn't your fault Jacks... you saved me." She said softly and caress his cheek. Their eyes met and Jackson. "You are my tower of strenght Apes. I wouldn't forgive myself if I wasn't there in time. " He whispered, took her hand and kissed the inner of it. It was a moment of a deep bond and something was different, both could not explain.

"Here I got all. " Alex disturbed the moment and laid all the materials on the table. "How is she?" He asked in concern.

"I am fine Alex." April answered.

"thanks Alex. Could you please leave the room now." " Of course. Call me if you need me." He left the room.

She tried to get up, so he could take better care of her wounds. But stopped when she felt pain. " AH" She moaned in pain.

"What? Are you in pain?" He asked full of concern and helped her up."

"Yeah my back."

" Maybe the ribs... I have to take a look on it." April bit nervous on her underlip. But at first let me take care of the wounds on your face." She nodded. So he took a pledge put some desinfective agent on it and took care of her. April inhaled sharp when she felt pain. "I am sorry... I know it hurts. " "it's OK." April said quietly. After a few minutes Jackson said. "okay that's it. Now I will take care of your back. April gave him a frightend look and bit her lip. He crouched down, so he could look straight in her eyes. "April... look at me... please... you need to trust me in this... I would do something you don't want or hurt you... " He explained.

" April... Trust me. PLEASE. I need to take a look." She nodded still nervous. He softly took her shirt off. He looked for the wound on her back first. "Could you get on the edge of the couch, so I can sit behind you?" She tried but falls against his chest. " WOOOAH Apriil he whispered and held her on the waist to protect her from falling. Jackson tried to not stare at her. But damn how beautiful she was. He shook his head, lost in thoughts. He craddled behind her and genltly exermine her ribs.

April stiffened by his touch.

"Do I hurt you?" He asked. She shook her head. It hurts , but she was also painfully aware of his closeness. It felt also extremely good to feel his hands on her bare skin. But he was also her best friend and he schouldn't have thoughts like that. " It seems like nothing is broken. But I will give you heparine cream to ease the pain. " He reached for the cream and massaged her back. " Who would have thought that I will ever nursing you?" He tried to comfort the situation while he puts the cream on Aprils back. Both laugh. She has such a silky skin. By the sight of her his stomach turned. It made him sick that she got hurt. He love her Freckles. God damn he was acting like a horny teenager. April is injuired and all he could think abbout is. Is how apes is looking without her bra. He shook the thoughts of. "So we are done... he kissed her shoulder without thinking and April shivered by his soft touch. Got the attraction He craddled out of the couch and handed April her shirt.

"thanks. " She smiled. She puts both arms in the shirt and tried to get in on. But couldn't stretched her back without causing massive pain. She sighed in frustration and embrassment. "Jackson could you help me, please"

"Sure Apes" He answered and carefully helped her. April blushed.

"Thank you." She whispered.

If you want I can carry you in your room, so you can get some sleep?" He asked.

"I think I am able to walk by myself, but maybe you can support me while wakling." She asked him.

" Yeah sure. But I can carry yourself... it is not a big deal. You don't a tone. You know." He grinned.

"No I am walkinng" She protested.

"alright." Jackson gave in. He helped her up and walked with her in small steps to her room. He helped her to take a seat on the edge of her bed and took gently her legs to shift into bed. He put the sheets gently on her and said. "And now I will make you a hot chocolate with cinnamon like you used to.

"You don't have to do this... " April said but a bright smile was on her face.

" I know. Be right back. " He smirked.

" You don't even know how to heat up milk..." She joked.

"For what are Microwaves for huh" He gave April a wink and disappeared in the kitchen.

April Smiled and tried not to fall asleep. Thank you god that you brought Jackson in my life. With these thought April fell asleep with a smile on her face.

Jackson went back to April and said triumphantly: SO... her it is... a hot chocolate with a prize of cinnamon... aaaaannd cream." He smiled as he noticed that felt asleep already and put the hot chocolate on the covered her with the duvet and sat down on the edge of the bed. How peaceful she looked right now. He thought.

This was a hard and confusing dam for them both. The thought of not being at the right place in time killed him He wouldnt imangine what then would maybe happened. He now realizes how much he cared about her. That wouldn't want to live without her. She was a part of him...she complement him...she gave him hope and strength In moment when felt bad...she was his person that he knew now more than ever...he just wanted to protect her... he want to prevent her innocent soul from all evil in the world.. But he also saw her in a different way now and not only because he saw in that really intimate moment... but because since today he had a lesson how fast life could end... he was a doctor... and was confronted by death every single day. But it never related somebody who was this close... ok … maybe he had the change to stop the situation before it got even worse... but could get raped or killed...the thoughts revolved around. he felt tears in his eyes...

But he had to admit that this situation changed his view of April. April was a woman... a very attractive one... her innocence and tentaiveness made her even sexier... he thought with a smile curling on his lips... she was so beautiful... but she was April... his best friend.. she was the most well tempered human he knew .. she had the greatest heart... he didn't want to risk their friendship... it meant the world to him... What kind of Idoit he would be too think think that he deserved her ..he would never risk too loose her. Because he was every but not perfect... with these last thoughts he kissed her forehead in awe and left her roon.


	2. Crossing Paths

**Hey lovelies. Here it is the next chapter:) I am so happy that you like the story and wanted to thank everyone, who reviewed/followed/ Favorite my story. It really make my day:) So I hope you like the second chapter. Please leave me a review and let me know what you think:) as ever I am sorry for any writing mistakes... I am not a native speaker. But I hope you like aanyway;)**

 **All characters belong to Shonda.**

Chapter Two

Crossing Path

In the middle of the night Jackson was woken uo by hearing April Scream. After a second, Jackson was wide awake and ran in Aprils room. "April, what is wrong? He ask in fear and sat on the edge of her bed. Then he recognizes that April was still asleep and having a nightmare. She toss and turn. " No...No..." She started screaming again. He tried to wake her up by grabbing her arms. But she still tossed and turned herself. "April, wake up! You are dreaming! Nothing is gonna happen to you!" He said loud and was slightly shaking her.

April opened her eyes and gave Jackson a shocking and confusing look. "You were dreaming Apes, you are home, you are alright, I am here." Jackson whispered soft.

April started to cry.

Jackson laid right beside, so they could have eye contact, wrapped his arms around her and tried tto calm her down. " Sssh calm down, I here now you are save. I am not leaving you... he laid his forehead against hers. Go back to sleep Aper " He whispered and stroked her hair.

" If I go to sleep the horrible pictures will haunting me again..." She said in fright.

He held her in a tight hug.

" If you want I'll stay right here and hold you until you wake up in the morning?" He offered.

" No you don't have to... she started... but he inerrupted her and said:

"I want too... now go to sleep Apes... I am pushing the bad dreams back ...He smiled, put her head unto his chest and caress her copper hair.

She felt his warm breath on her face and it comforted her .She was so grateful to have him. She thought before she felt into a deep sleep without bad dreams.. It took Jackson a while to fell asleep. His conscience punished him too much. Not a long a while ago, he had the same sleeping issues and April was always there for him, right after the horrible shooting. even though she had lost Reed, too. He would do everything in his power to help her go through this... he promised himself and her. He thought. Then he also fell in deep sleep with April in his arms.

April woke up and noticed that it was already morning, because the sun shined through her window.. now she remembered the events of yesterday... She remembered that Jackson saved her... how he took care of her. .. that she had nightmares and he calmed her down and how she fell asleep in his arms. She felt save in his arms. Thanks to him she at least got some hours of sleep. But now she realizes how entwined they both were. His arms were wind around her and hold her close to his chest. She tried to unwind herself, but couldn't move any centimeter. April shook him soft to wake him up.

He slowly opened his eyes and said sleepy: " Morning." in a husky voice.

"Morning... I think we have to get up and go to work."

"Yeah you are right. " Jackson answered and smiled.

"soo … for that you have to let me out of your arms Jacks." She giggled.

Oh... oh of course... " He stuttered sheepishly and got up. " Sorry Apes... you couldn't sleep, so I thought... maybe if I hold you in my arms..." He started rambling.

She giggled in response. "Relax. I slept very well, thank you. " She gave him a bright smile. April sat on the edge of the bed and said: " I'll take a shower now. Then we can go to work."

" Do you need any help in the shower?" Jackson asked as if would be totally naturally.. "

April eyes widened and her cheeks blushed immediately. "No. Jackson..."

By that Jackson become aware of the ambiguousness of his offer. His eyes widened in shock as well and he explained : " Oh god no I don't mean it that way... "

" I will go now. " April said a little awkwardly.

" Yeah and I will make some coffee..." Jackson said feeling the same awkwardness and watched April escape out of the room.

April was glad that the heparine cream of yesterday had done his duty. So she could move herself much better than yesterday... otherwise she had have to let herself help in the shower... and she couldn't imagine how embarrassing that would be. She slowly took her clothes of and walked into the shower. The feeling of the trickled warm water over her skin calmed her instantly down. The events rushed through her brain again. How awkward it all was and how good in the same time... the intensity of hos looks and touch something chanced definetly... she sighed in frustration and shook her her to get off this thoughts.

...don't be ridiculous April... your family keep calling you duckie... your neurotic... a jesus believing crazy virgin... why for gods sake would someone like JACKSON AVERY would have other feeling instead of friendship for me... it was possibly the intense of the moment and she just over interpreted it … with these thoughts she climbed out of the shower., dressed herself and went to the kitchen.

There she saw Jackson making some peauut-butter toasts.

"Coffee is ready." Jackson said and filled a cup with it.

" Thanks; but it is late... I think we have to go..." April answered.

Jackson leaned on the kitchen counter in front of her. "Are you sure you are able to work...? Because I don't think so. I could take a day of, too... so I can take care of you... look after you..." He asked with a concerned voice and and held her gaze.

"No, Jackson. The ER needs me. I can do this... I don't have to run the whole day... "

" But you have to stand on your legs all the time and that's not good for your ribs... please be wise April...Nobody would expect that from you after what happened. " Jackson insisted.

"I need this Jacks. It is like a drug for me... I need this... please understand me." She begged.

Jackson knew what a pighead April could be sometimes and gave in.

"So come lets go. It is waste of breath to convince you." He chuckled and smirked. He walked to the front door to put his jacket on, when he saw that April still was in the kitchen corner.

"April what you are doing there... " He asked a little impatient.

" I am just filling some coffee in a thermos jug and packing something to eat for work."

Jackson rolled his eyes in disbelieve. "April I can buy you a coffee and something to eat in the hospital... you know that. It is 4$ Apes. He respond.

"No no I am already finished. We can go:" She smiled and walked toward Jackson, who helped her get in her coat,

"thanks but you don't have..." She began but he interupted her: " Shut up Apes. At least take a little help of me..." " You have already helped me enough yesterday. She answered fondly.

For now April had the change to sneak in the hospital without being seen by anyone and recognizing her bruised face or that she hobbled.

But then a familiar voice spoke up from behind.

"Kepner aren't you able to walk anymore. Had it already been accomplished?" Mark called after her in amusement.

April quickened her pace, so that she could escape him. But then Christina saw her: " Holy Shit, Kepner what have you done with face. " Christina asked in shock

"Nothing I just towards a door... very stupid... "She lied.

Christina observed her skeptically and said: " I Don't believe you."

" Sure! Ia m totally stupid... you know how clumsy I can be..."

Christina still eyed her in disbelieve but didn't say anything else

. Suddenly Jackson appeared out of the corner.

"Christina, stop it." He said in a determinate tone.

" oh you were responsible for this... I didn't know that you two like things like that..." Christina said amused.

"Just shut the fuck up Yang." Jackson said in annoyance and gave her an intense gaze.

" I'll go! Somehow or other a Bypass is waiting for me in OR 1. and I leave you alone with your pervert phantasy. But take care about her face it looks terrible!" She said and went away.

Jackson turned to April, gently rubbing her arms and asked. " Are you alright?"

She nodded. " Of course, but I couldn't find a better excuse, than I ran towards a door. She explained.

"Oh I guess that is realistic" Jackson joked. She smacked his arm and both laughed.

" Avery my son! So you are the reason why Kepner isn't able to walk today. I told you that stress release is good. But maybe you slow down a bit at first... this is new territory for Keppner" Mark called out and grinned.

Both turned around and Mark saw the whole damage of Aprils face.

"What the Fuck happened to your face Keppner. What have you done. He asked Jackson.

" He had nothing done Mark! I was stupid and I ran towards a door! I am still a virgin! I still believe in JESUS! So what the is there so difficult to believe that I only ran toward a door?! " April shouted, started to cry and ran away.

"April wait" Jackson said and ran after her.

April felt tears streaming down through her cheeks, when she ran into the next best on call room. She sat at the bed and the tears falling. A quiet knock sounded and the the door slowly opened. Jackson came in. " April... I am sorry. You know what an asshole Mark could be sometimes. " He apologized quietly.

April stood up and wiped her tears back. " I know... I knew that it would ne hard... but it was just to much:" She explained.

Jackson hugged her and calmly rubbed her back.

" I know" He whispered in her hair. " Are you OK and sure you didn't want to take the day off" He asked then.

"Yep I have to save lives. I am ok." With these words she left the on call room.

Jackson noticed some pink card on the floor now. They must have fallen out of her pocket... he grabbed them and read:

 _invite for my birthday party_

 _Hey lovelies._

 _On the 25_ _th_ _i'll throw a birthday party! And I would love if you come to my and Jacksons home to celebrate! Please bring something to drink. I'll cook, because I know you can't :)._

Jackson smirked and then he thought in shock: oh shit... tomorrow is her birthday... what an awful friend am I? Suddenly his pager beeped. He grabbed all the cards, left the room and laid them on the entrance desk, so everybody would notice it.

Jackson got home and just smelled a weird mix of aroma. There were cinnamon; but also the sense of garlic and meat. He confused wet to the kitchen. There he saw April cooking.

"Hey it smell good. What do you cooking?" He asked curios.

"Oh it's peanuts. Just something for my birthday party."

"This doesn't look like peanuts for me. May I help?" He asked. " Oh thank you. But I am almost done. Spaghetti, with tomato and garlic and the apple-cinnamon cake." She answered

"So then let me wash the dishes now." Jackson offered.

She nodded and he started to wash the dishes. He felt terrible for almost forgetting her birthday and asked: "Do you need anything else for tomoror? I could stop by the supermarket and grab something."

"No, I don't think thats nessesary. I already got all.

"Do you have enough alcohol?" He asked

" Two bottle of vodka and and 4 6er packages of beer."

" How many people will come? Two? He grinned.

She hits playfully with a towel: "stop teasing me." She laughed. "Eleven, plus kids" She admired quietly.

" OK. I will get some alcohol tomorrow." Jackson said smiling.

April bend down to put the cake out of the oven. Jackson couldn't help; but had to stare at her boody. The tight skinny jeans perfect fit around her legs and booty. Stop staring! You are awful! He said to himself. He was donE with the dishes and grabbed some beer out of the fridge.

Magically attracted by the smell, Alex walked into the kitchen. "Hmm... what smells that good? CAKE!" He shouted happy like a child and wanted to take a taste.

"Don't you dare. That is ssupposed to be touched until the party." She gave Alex a clap on hiss fingers. "OK, OK calm down" Alex chuckled; grabbed himself a beer as well and sat beside Jakson on the couch. J

ackson and Alex drunk their beer and observed April while she's cooking, or better her butt... As Jackson caught himself staring at her again, he saw that Alex also were staring. Jackson gave him a light elbow punch. "Stop staring at her butt." He whispered.

"Dude as if you don't stare at her." Alex said amused, got up, clapped Jacksons shoulder and said: "Buddy I go to sleep. See you tomorrow." and left.

Later in the night, jackson wanted to grab some water and saw April sitting on the couch. "April... why are you awake it's 11:45 pm?" He asked in concern and sat beside of her. "I could sleep, so I thought I watched some TV. I am just so excited about the party, it is nothing" She yawned.

"April I know you for almost 5 years now... I know when you lie to me." She nervous bit her lip and whispered: I am scared to sleep.. I am afraid to have nightmares again." His look softened. "I could lay with you in bed and read my book until you are asleep?" He suggested.

"Really?" She asked in disbelieve.

"Yep, you can accept it as your birthday present!" He joked "Come lets go to bed you have dark circles under your eyes. I'll take my book and come to you."

She get up to bed. A few minutes later,

Jackson came in and made himself comfortable besides her. He pend his book and said: "Good night Apes... oh and happy birthday." He got no response. He looked to April and saw her sleeping . Little cute snores were escaping out of her. He grinned by that sight and wanted to read, but than the tiredness overwhelmed him as well.

Jackson woke up by the first shafts of sunlight and tried to sneak out of Aprils room. It was her birthday and day off, he didn't want to wake her. So he hushed out off the room on tiptoes and closed the do slowly.

"Avery is Keppner awake? I wanted to wish her a happy bithday." April said loud.

"No, she is still asleep." He hissed.

By that Karev raised an eyebrow in amusement and said: "So what you're doing in her room... or you slept there... " Karev grinned. "did you deflower Keppner on her birthday?" Alex laughed out loud. "

"It none of your buisness, but no! And now let me go to work before I punch you again!" Jackson barked.

10 hours later

oh god in one hour the first guests arrive. Thought April, not trying to panic. She did the last arrangements for the party, hectically. She put the pink napkins with floral design on the buffet table. She looked at the table and was proud of her work. Than she saw the two bottles of vodka, who were standing alone and lost in the right corner. Damn Jackson was right... I had to have to buy more alcohol... I hope Jackson didn't forget to buy some... she thought.

As if he could her thoughts. The front door opened. "Thank god you are here!" She rushed to him "Have you bought the alcohol?" Without answering he he put out the bottles. "We have two Russian brothers here!" He pulled to bottles of vodka out of his bag. "One of our Scottish brothers..." He held a bottle of Scottish Whiskey in the air. "And... of course... some Mexican flavor!" He held up a bottle of tequila and smiled.

She let out a happy laugh and said: "Jacks you're the best. It would be a disaster without your help." She gave him a kiss on her cheek.

"No proplem, but wait until you see what I found for you" He smiled proud and took out a bottle of Rosé... which he knew she loved. "I know you love a good Rosé... so I thought I buy one for you." He smiled.

"Oh Jackson you are amazing"! She gasped in excitement.

"Are you done with the arrangements or do you need any help? He asked.

" No, all is ready for the party! " And than the doorbell rang. " The guests are to early. " She squeaked, rushed to the door and opened it. It were Meredith, Derek, Christina and Zola. " Hey you. I am so glad you come. " She greeted all and then she greeted Zola: "Hey ZoZo my princess how are you." "Happy Brithday April all congratulated and hugged her. Christina said:" And look wha I have here, to heat up the party." She smiled and showed April the bottle of tequila. "I knew it!" April mummered to herself.

"OH MY GOSH YOU GOT SELMADE CAKE! " Christina shouted and ran to the buffet. The atmosphere was great. All laughed, ate and drank. Than the rest of the guests arrived. April qiukly opened the door and welcomed, Callie, Arizona, Sophia, Lexie and Mark. "Hey lovelies! Come in!" She greeted. "Happy birthhday April! Look what I brought for you! " He smiled smugly and took twister (the game) out of his back.

"Oh my gosh that is amazing Mark."April squeaked. "There Child-dreams become true." Meredith laughed. "I hope this IS ONLY for the children?" Christina asked annoyed.

"Nope Yang it is only meant for our pleasure " Mark smirked. Yang shrugged her shoulders: "Fine but I definitely need ore to drink then. But Keppner starts!" She rushed to got some tequila.

"So who will play against April." Mark asked in the Round.

"Avery, he is her best friend." Alex growled and grinned knowingly.

"Ok, duty calls." Jackson smiled already a little boozed from the alcohol and placed himself on opposite site of April by the Twistermap and was smiling at her.

" Soooo...lets start... Lexie turn the wheel!" Mark ordered full of excitement.

"Right food... Red!" Lexie said.

Jackson and April did as they were told. "Next Round!" Mark said. " "Left food... Blue!"

That was easy. Now they are standing towards each other and smiled.

"So lets get more action in here... "Left Hand … Yellow!" Mark said and grinned.

April made a bridge to reach the yellow fielld and arched her back. "Oh now it gonna be interesting." Mark smirked. Jackson, who had no other choice climbed over her to reach the yellow field above her hand. He struggled a little bit. His chest almost touched Aprils breasts

"Yeah Avery!" Mark said proud. "Right hand... Red!" Mark called out. They put their other Hand on the fields. Their gazes met as they lay that close to another. It seems like the time stops... April wasn't able to breathe... you could cut the air by that sexual energy...

April tried not to met his intense gaze... bad idea... because his shirt slipped a litte bit and she could a part of define and muscular six pack... strange feeling were coming up through her head.

"So now, the next move... right food... Yellow!" Mark called out. ...no reaction... "Hello Kepner, Avery!..." still no reaction. " Earth to Jackson and April!" Mark yelled amused.

Both woke up0 of the _state of trance_ of sexual attraction and tried a little embarrassed the next move.

Yang and Karev watched the whole situation really in amusement. They looked to each other well knowing and Yang asked: "Do you see what I see?"

„Let's talk about sex, baby! Let's talk about you and me" sang Alex and smirked.

"Oh I have great plan Alex, but I need more alcohol. Lets met in the kitchen in about 5 min. " She giggled in excitement. 5 min later they met in the Kitchen.

"Oh yeah I am gonna askOwen that he page us, except of Avery and April! We give her the chance of her life. To get laid by pretty boy!" She laughed drunk and took her phone.

"Wait but we don't have to go to work then?" Alex asked.

"Evil spawn... you are silly... of course not" She laughed and called owen. First ring...second ring... "Christina?"She heard on the other line.

" Oh owen you need to help us; PLEASE! " She giggled.

Owen sighed. "Are you drunk?"

"Yeah but that is not the matter right now... what matters is … sexual vibration!" She laughed in excitement.

"What? Of you? Owen asked confused.

"No you Idiot! Kepner and Avery! Soooo you have to page all off us to the ER, besides April and Jackson!" Christina explained, totally thrilled by the idea.

"Christina really? you can't be serious. He asked in disbelieve.

"If you love me, you'll do that for me! And I am your best cardio, besides Teddy!" Christina tried to convince him:

Owen sighed again.

"Please Owen, What could happen? Except of Sex maybe?! By the way, we can have sex too tonight. " She offered and giggled drunk.

"OK I will page you in 5 min." Owen gave finally in.

" YOU ARE THE BEST! I LOVE YOU!" Christina cheered and hung up.

Full of anticipation they got back to the living room.

Now Mark and Callie sprawled across the twistermap. After a while a Choir of pagers went on. "It is the ER! Multiple car crash!" Meredith said.

April who heard the pagers, too, said "Wait i'll go with you!

"No your staying here. It is your birthday You were not being paged! " Christina answered.

"That is weird. I am also not being paged." Jackson said confused.

" Maybe owen didn't want to ruin the party and thought you could stay as her best. Also we already have Mark for plastics. So have fun!" Meredith said and smiled before leaving the house with the others.

"Even better... more to drink for us!" He said and closed the front door.

Before all of them got in their cars. Christina yelled: "Stop, we don't have to go! It was fake paging! Didn't you notice, what there is going on between Avery and Virgin Mary? I Wanted to give them a chance to making up!" Christina laughed.

All grinned in a row. "Yang I am impressed! I didn't know you could be that romantic. " Callie answered.

"That's nor romantic. It is realistic observing and the possibility of opportunities." Christina said. "Soo... that means that we can continue drinking?" Mark asked. "Yep. Lets go to JOE's then " Karev answered.

Meanwhile in Jackson and Aprils house

"Urgh why Hunt didn't page me... he page me every time? " April asked in frustration.

"Because he didn't want to ruin your birthday. Come on, Apes.." He smiled.

"The party is already ruined, all guest are gone..." She pouted.

"But I am here. We can have our own party. For all I care with Justin Timperlake:" He reply with a smiled to lit her up. She rolled her eyes.

"At first I get something to drink. Do you want something, too?" She asked and walked to the buffet.

"Yeah Whiskey on the rocks, please!" He ordered and went to stereo to put some music on.

He put on Senorita of Justin Timberlake and danced to it.

April held two glasses in her hand and laughed. She took a huge sip of her glass and Jackson took both of her hands and took a sip, too, before pulled her to him to the imagined dancefloor and was sill performing in front of her, spun her around and sang loudly: _„_ _I don't know but I'm thinking bout, really leaving with you" H_ e turned her around, so he danced close behind her and sang seductively in her ear: _"It feels like something's heating up, can I leave with you?"_ April turned around, sang her part again and put her hand a little gamey on his chest. Without stopping their dance movements, they looked into each others eyes. It felt so naturally to whisper those seductively promises into her ear. Sex was in the air... he could felt it... She is your best friend... he thought. Sanity and desire were dueling in his mind. The magic of the moment and the desire were too overwhelming and he just wanted to taste her lips... he put a hand on her cheek, leaned forward and kissed her softly. He never imagined that this small touch could spark that much inside of him. April looked at him in surprise. Her eyes dark from desire.

"April." He whispered. He felt like he couldn't breathe...and his body was on fire... She still looked into her eyes and on her slightly open lips. He leaned forward and kissed her again, His hands gently grabbed her face. It cost him all of his willpower; to not grab her wildly and kiss her with all intensity. He knew that this was knew to April. He didn't want to push her or be too offensive... Then April relaxed. Jackson began slowly to nibble on her underlip and genltly followed the contuor of her lips with his tongue tip.

April let out a small moan and opened her lips in response. This wasn't her first kiss, but it felt like it. She thought. She put her hands around his neck, leaned on him. The kiss was like a trustful touch and sinful temptation in once. Her whole body pulsed.

Her small moan just fueled even more. A lustful groan escaped Jacksons mouth. He grabbed with his hands into her hair and explored her mouth with his tongue. This kiss consumed him. He never had felt something similar... the kiss touched him in the deepest soul. The desire for her was unbearable... Their tongues interwinded in a passionate dance. She was a fast learner.. he thought. Her knees weakened and grab his arms for support.

He had the feeling that he merged with her. He was so overwhelmed. But the voice of sanity spoke to him through the mist of passion... this is April... she deserves more than a drunken hanky panky... he softy ended the kiss. Gasping for air. He stroke her cheeks and leaned his forehead on hers. His blood rushed through his veins... he couldn't breathe. This kiss was different. It felt like everything he searched for. April was always there, but he didn't knew that she were the key to his soul... she let him have needs and feelings, he never had. Normally he took what he wanted from a woman . Even more when he knew she was craving for it as muchas he did. But April was different. He wanted to worship her. That she give herself to him .

She looked at him confused and insecure. "Jackson" She whispered.

He took her face between his hands: His hands were shaking and kissed her forehead:"We can't do this."

" Why?" Tears dwelt in her eyes.

"April" He said again. His eyes were begging for forgiveness

"No it is ok... I am weird and a virgin... and April... so it is ok. It was the alcohol... I get it" She nervous rambled and avoid his gaze.

How could she say that ? He thought.

"April" He whispered again..

"No I better go!" She said, her voice cracked.

She tried to leave, but he grabbed her by the arm. "April, wait!" He begged. He kissed her again He felt her tears on his cheeks and he put all his desire for her in this kiss. " I want you. Believe me. But not like that. This isn't the right moment."

She ripped off of his grip... April started to cry: "Then why you are pushing me back?" She asked in frustation.

"I am not pushing you away... you deserve so much more then a drunk hanky panky... Your first experiences should be special... "

She get closer and stroked his cheek. "Something that felt that good, can not be bad, right?"

He smiled, kissed her and said. "Yeah... but as much as I want to... we can't do this now... you mean everything to me... why you don't understand me?" He asked. "That I am saying no to you, doesn't mean that don't want you.. it...you are everything for me..." His voice cracked

"OK.. I go to bed right now." April said and flew to her bedroom.

Jackson wanted to follow her, but didn't if thats a good idea. He himself wasn't sure about what already happened... what it supposed to mean. He took another drink, sat on the couch and let out a deep breath. He buried his face in his hands and groan in frustration.

Lost in thought, he took another sip to clear his thoughts. The thoughts in his head were still spinning around. He still could feel the taste of Aprils lips on his.

Some things changed definitely... He had crossed a border...And he wasn't, if he could go back... or if he wanted too?... And that scared him like hell...it scared him to think how things would move on...that he maybe destroyed everything, instead of bringing it further...Things that he didn't even plan to bring further... but when he reviewing the the incidents of what just happened, he had to admit that he wanted THIS...this what just happen... every bone in his body was craving for her now. It felt phenomenal... That someone finally touched his lost soul like this. Someone who could see the good in him... even if he doesn't... but he would everything put on risk... The risk of maybe losing her completely. He reminded the sight of April tearful eyes, again. His chest tighten painfully by this memory... he didn't want too hurt her... or made her cry...he only wanted to show her, how much she ment to him... and that she realizes her worth... her iner beauty (and her beauty on the outside of course). But he simply let her go...without making thing really clear... he had to go to her and making things clear! With these thought he empty his glass and went to Aprils room.

He knocked softly, but no response. He was worried about her, so he decided to get in. April was felt asleep in an embryo – position. He went to her bed and saw that her face was still wet from tears. His heart literally broke by the sight of her. He gently stroke a strain out of her face.

"I am so sorry, Apes... " He whispered with tearful eyes and wanted to leave.

"Jackson?" He heard a quiet, broken whisper of April.

He immediately turned around and took a seat on the edge of her bed. April was sill in the embryo-position, but had her eyes open.

"April?" He said quietly. He didn't what he was supposed to say... he couldn't move..

"I am sorry Jackson..." She whispered, her voiced filled with pain.

Jackson blinked a couple of times, he must have misheard something. Why on heavens sake, did SHE apologize to HIM? " Whaaat?" He asked confused and leaned closer to her.

"For god's sake! You didn't have to apologize for anything...I am the one who have to apologize...I didn't mean to hurt you " He said soft. She sniffled and whispered

"It's OK Jackson... it was the alcohol...We are still friends?"

No it wasn't just the alcohol... he thought Jackson had to gulp after her words. He gently caress her hair and respond: "Of course, we're still friends... Look... all the things I've said before were true... you mean everything to me April! Nothing in the world will ever gonna change that... do you hear me"

"Okay." April whispered and looked at him. "I really didn't want to hurt you Apes! You have to believe me... please..." His voice cracked.

She grabbed his hand and squeezed it: "I believe you Jackson! I just don't wanna loose you!" She said and a single tear escaped her eye.

" You never will!" He answered honestly.

"You promise?" She asked fearful her lips trembled "

He felt a lump in his throat, and hoped he could fight back tears. "I promise!" He answered and kissed her lighly on her forehead. " Sleep well, Apes, see you tomorrow"

At odds with oneself, he went to his bedroom. He was standing on a crossing path. He didn't want to endanger their friendship. He would do anything to not loose her. Even if it meant to swear off the things , he just wanted so bad.


	3. Say it loud!

**Hey lovelies. Here it is the next chapter:) I am so happy that you like the story and wanted to thank everyone, who reviewed/followed/ Favorite my story. It really make my day:) So I hope you like the second chapter. Please leave me a review and let me know what you think:) as ever I am sorry for any writing mistakes... I am not a native speaker. But I hope you like aanyway;) Let me know what you think.**

 **All characters belong to Shonda.**

Chapter 3

Say it loud

April was making coffee in the morning - she's maybe gonna need 5 cups at once. She didn't sleep any second last night. The thoughts in her head, didn't let her rest.

All she could think about, was Jackson and the events of yesterday. Did this really happen yesterday? Yeah it is. Otherwise it wouldn't be that present. When she reminisced about himself dancing to Justin Timberlake yesterday, she couldn't help but had to smile. Justin Timberlake. She shook her head in lost of thoughts. He hated Justin Timberlake and was always teasing her about being a fan of him. But yesterday he just danced with her to Seniorita to lit her mood up.

And how he was dancing... he was so handsome. She thought.

She felt so free in that moment and so alive. And the kiss. The kiss was just... indescribable... the feeling of his lips on hers was intoxicating...it was like an explosion... she felt the kiss with every fiber of her body. April shivered by this memory. But the worse part of it...it felt so... so good that she in secret wished that he would kiss her again. Maybe even more than that.

But she knew that it would never happen again. It was the alcohol. Jackson was drunk last night. He was carried away by the magic of the moment. But what was she even thinking... nobody was interested in her... and he was Jackson Avery... the most handsome guy she knew... she was inexperienced, ugly and annoying. He can have every woman in the would... so why should he been interested in HER?, she thought and filled herself another cup of coffee.

"Good morning." She suddenly heard Jackson´s voice, cringed and tossed her coffee over her hand.

"Shit" She cruised.

Jackson quickly turned the water tap on, grabbed her hand and put it under the cold water strain. The cold water felt good, but small vesicle were already showing up.

"Sorry Apes, I didn't mean to scare you."

"no problem. I was a little clumsy like always" She answered.

"Let me take a look!" Jackson carefully checked her and said: " It is not that that bad... only a small burn." and caressed soft the not burned parts of her hand and looked at her.

April nervously avoid his gaze.

He have to talk to her... He didn´t want that she couldn´t barely look at him. But at first he have to take care of her hands. "April, take a seat I get a cream for burn injuries." April nodded, took a seat in front of the kitchen table. Jackson was already back and took a seat on the opposite of April.

"So let´s take a look if we can fix it." he said laughingly.

" Jackson I can do this by myself" April protested quietly and tried to ripped her hands out of his grip.

"Apes" Jackson whispered and hold her Hand still in his. Now April finally looked up at him. He saw insecurity and maybe even anxiety in her eyes. Now he noticed the dark circles around her eyes. She must have had just as little sleep as like himself...He thought... and carefully put the cream on the burned places of her hand. In the meanwhile he watched her from the corner of one´s eye.

"April, we have to talk." he said.

April cringed lightly by his words. She didn´t wan´t to talk about it... She wanted to continue like nothing changed. She was scared to talk about the things that happened yesterday... She was scared about his explanations... Scared of his rejections.. She thought.

"But I have to go to work now!" she hovered.

"April" Jackson answered disappointed

"We can talk after work" she answered hectically, stood up from the table and flew out of the house. "Shit!" Jackson cruised and let out deep sigh. Now he went to work as well. He had to talk to her as soon as possible. He couldn´t wait until after work.. he thought.

He was more than concentrated ...he had luck that he didn´t have to operate today.. He was worried.. worried about April.. That she couldn't even look at him... agonized him ... He have to fix things between them... If he had known that this kiss would put their friendship on the line, that she would disown herself from him, he hadn´t done it... but god dammit, he wanted this kiss more than all things in the world. He didn´t regret the kiss. As he thought back at the kiss a small smile lingered on his face. He had enjoyed the kiss every second and the fact that she maybe hadn´t been kissed often, too...

"Ouch!" a patient called out which he was treating now.

"Sorry." Jackson murmured. "Avery to be unconcentrated is absolutely unacceptable for the plastic posses!" Marks voice sounded behind.

Jackson looked up and saw Mark grinning.

"I couldn´t sleep well last night."Jackson justified himself.

Marks grin turned brighter. "Did you had fun with Kepner?"

Jackson gave Mark an evil eye.

"Oh common we all have seen how you been eye fucking her on the twister map!"Mark responded. "Shut the fuck up Mark!" Jackson said angry.

"You don´t have to had false modesty here, you can tell me everything and don´t brood that much, that only brings ugly wrinkles on you one million dollar face son!" He clapped him fatherly on his shoulder. "Go and grape yourself some coffee, I´m going o here; before you screw up everything!" he noted thankfully and handed him the stich instruments and went out to find April. It seems like a eternity since he found April. She wasn´t in an OR or in the Cafeteria. He searched out in the Corridor and suddenly spotted her in the side Corridor.

He called after her but it seems like she didn´t heard him.

"April, wait!" he shouted out again and ran after her. He tried to reached her, grabbed her arm and pulled her into an one call room.

"Jackson, I have to work!"

"April we´ve to talk!"

"But I have to work!" she said but couldn´t stand his gaze.

He get a step closer and his arms don´t let her arms go.

"Then why you can´t look at me? Look at me, April!"

April nervously gestured with her hands and smiled.

" Thats ridiculous Jackson! I´m only stressed. That´s all. I´ve to go."

"Then look into my eyes and tell me that is all alright between us and I don´t screwed up everything! And I will let you go back to work!"

She bit her underlip and looked nervously up to Jackson... but she was only two seconds able to stand his gaze.

"April, we´ve to talk about yesterday!"

"Nope, why? It´s alright, we are still friends. It was the alcohol." she said without looking at him.

"April, look at me, god dammit!" he said a little louder now though he didn´t want to be louder.

Now she finally looked up at him.

"It wasn´t only the alcohol!" Jackson explained. His eyes turned darker by the remembrance of the kiss.

"I wanted to kiss you! The alcohol was only a help to override the fear, because I was scared of right these consequences! That you barely can look at me. If I have done something that hurts you, i´m really sorry! I would never do something that might hurt you on propose.

But never ascribe to me that it happens because of the alcohol!" he said loud and felt the rage overcome him. He would ´ve like to approve it with another kiss. He saw the the tears dwelling in her eyes.

"No Jaacks, you didn´t hurt me... The problem is... It felt so good.. And I didn´t know what I have to do now. I didn´t even know how I ´m supposed to acting towards you, because every time I look at you or you touch me, I have to think about that kiss and that I want to kiss you again." She bit her lip and blushed.

Jackson grinned. His heart skipped a beat b her words.

"But I know, that will never gonna happen again... Because.. I don´t know... I´m me... I mean you could have any other women so why the hell you would want to kiss the most inexperience and most annoying woman in the world? "

Jackson stepped closer so that their bodies almost touched. She stepped a step backwards. Jackson followed her.

"What if I tell you that I would to love to kiss you again and I can´t thing about anything else either He stepped closer and closer and she toe slowly black. April looked at him in disbelieve.

"What if exactly your inexperience and you turns me on...?" he paused a while.

In the meanwhile April could feel the wall behind her and there was no escape anymore.

Jackson´s lips where only a few millimetres away from her´s and she could feel his hot breath on her face." I´m scared, too how This will continue but something that feels that good can´t be bad, right? You say it yourself!" he whispered. He barely couldn´t resist to claim her lips again with his.

"Something that feels that good can´t be bad!" She breathed out. Her arms wandered slowly to his neck. Now she finally hold his gaze. Her eyes filled with ardent desire. April knew that this was a dangerous path. She didn´t know what Jackson wanted from her. She had her principles and her faith but he could let it happen that she through her principles away and that scared the shit out of her. She gasp when he grabbed her face and slowly leaned to her. But before their lips met, the pager started buzzing. The cringed and April accidently bumped his head with hers. The magic of the moment was over. Jackson touched protectively for his nose: "Oh my god did I hurt you?" She asked. He couldn't help laughing. "No, it is nothing!" He answered and looked at his pager: "it is Mark … I have to go. We're continue this conversation, when we are home, ok" He asked her hopeful. "Yes, we'll talk later." He smiled at her and went to Mark.

April was confused. On one hand, it was a really good felling... Jackson was her rock. She felt save with him... but on the other han, this whole thing, what is going on now, scared her a lot...This situation put all what was before, on the edge... her priorities... all that she was...She was afraid to explain her fears to Jackson...that he maybe found it ridiculous...and even if she trow her priorities awayfor him... that she would screw up anything... God she was so scared... she thought.

Suddenly Christina came across. "Hey I need you to assist me on a transplantation in ten minutes in OR 2." Now Yang noticed the worried look on Aprils face. "hey what is going on Kepner? You look sad. Have we screwed up your party Yesterday?" Christina aasked curios.

"No, no Jackson and I celebrated a little and we went to bed to sleep." She answered nervously and blushed.

"you two were making up, right?" Yang gasped in excitement.

"No of course not! Are you nuts?" April denied it.

"Kepner you're not a good liar." Christina answered. April bit her bottom lip and blushed even more.

" You like him, right?" Yang asked her soft.

April only nodded shyly. Everyone can see that. But he likes you, too! He totally try to get in your pants!" Christina grinned widely.

"Christina" April hissed in shock.

"Anyway see you in the OR in ten minutes." Yang called over her Shoulder and disappeared.

As Jackson found Mark, another happy voice already sounded: "Jackson my sweett boy, come give your mommy a kiss." Jackson mother greeted him. She hugged her son and gave him a kiss on his cheek.

He couldn't believe his one's eyes – his mother was the last thing he needed now... "He thought angry. " Mom what are you doing here?" He asked in wonder and glanced angry to Mark. I asked to keep it secret, I wanted to surprise you!"

"Sorry Avery. But if Catherine Avery ask you for a favor, you can't say no." Mark smiled. "Betrayer." Jackson smiled back.

"Well, at first I am here to see my baby boy. But Mark has a Patient who needs a bleeder reconstructions and asked me for help... and otherwise I didn't hear a word of you! I Don't know if your alive, or how you doing...!" His mom complained. "And I would like to, if you would come to the Harper Avery Foundation Gala to represent the Averys?" His mother asked him.

"Is that really necessary mom... I didn't have plus one."

"Yes it is! So than ask April. She is your best friend and maye the cute thing will lighten up a bit, then" Catherine suggested

Jackson took his Iphone and sent April a text. _Hey April my mother is here (I am freakin out) and she wants me to go to the avery foundation gala... would you pleaseee be my +1?" " I would love to, but I have nothing to wear for such an event..." "Pleeeaaase Apes, you'll find something and there will be many Rose for Free.:) Don't let me down Apes!" "I never would Jacks:)" "You are the best:* I'll pick you up at 8 pm! I'll change my closes at marks place:)"_ he put hid Iphone back in his pocket and smiled. He went to the OR with a much better mood than he expected.

3 hours later

April searched like crazy for something to wear. After a few minutes, she decided to wear her red dress. She had weard at the silver wedding of her parent, which had a huge back neckline. And red was the favorite color of Jackson...She thought. She looked in the mirror and this was the perfect choice. She thought it was long and elegant, silky. Perfect. She just put some Make Up, and pinned up do her hair and then she was ready. Then already the doorbell rang. She opened it and in front of her stood a very handsome looking Jackson Avery.

He was wearing an anthracite colored suit a wine red tie and a black shirt.

"Hey Jacks." She greated and smiled up to him.

When he saw April it left him breathless. She looked stunning. Also he saw April in a dress for the first time. She should do that more often... she look beautiful... and needn't to hide it... he thought. "You look gorgeous!" He Whispered.

"So do you" She answered.

"Should we?" He asked and hooked herself in his arm. He opened the door of his and helped her to get in.

The gala was the most pompous thing April ever had seen. Waiters with champagne and sack everywhere, chandeliers and so many people... she thought. April was nervous, so she drank in every occasion chaaampagner. Jackson introduced to some important people.

As Jackson saw how nervous she was, he had to grin.

Now his mother found them: " Jackson I was looking for you and the lovely April! How are you Darling. I was so happy that could be my sons company. Come lets go to the bar and have an apple-martini together. " She said

"I would love to, but ii think I already had to much to drink. April answered.

"Don't be silly sweetheart! You never can drink to much. " Catherine winked and pulled her to the bar. April took a seat and Jackson whispered into her ear: I am sorry, but she is the personified devil."

"I think one glass is ok" She whispered back

. "Son you have a Job to do! I will take care of April. Go ! "

Jackson throw her mother an evil eye and said: "Duty calls, be right back." And gently caressed Aprils Arm and said: "Mom no funny business, am I clear!" before leaving. April felt a little uncomfortable. Catherine Avery was her Idol... she stalked her on Facebook... but she was also the mother of Jackson... she did not how to behave now.

"Honey, relax. I am not the holy pope. I am Jackson mother. So how are you hun? Catherine asked softly."I am fine. A little stressed because of the upcoming boards" April said and took a sip. "Any news on the loveside?" His mother asked

April swallowed up "Uhm nothing new." April stuttered. She another huge sip of her cocktail. "How long do you know my son?"

"5 Years, we started our internship together.

"You two are very close."

"Yep we are best friends." April took another big sip. In that moment April felt a hand on her shoulder.

"I am hoping my mother isn't torturing you that much?" April immediately relaxed.

The way how Jackson looked at April she well known... She secretly always hoped, that something would develop between April and her son... mama knows babyboy... Catherine thought and smirked. "Second round honey!" She said to the bartender.

"Relax Sweetheart, you need a man my dear.: believe me nothing is better to relax, than great sex." Catherine explained.

"Ex..excuse me?" April stuttered in disbelieve. She empty her glass in one gulp and grabbed another glass of champagne of the waiter. " I am only giving you good advices. Honey, you will see, good sex is like the redemption of god."

" OH GOD" April shouted and empty the second glass and grabbed the next.

"Mom stop it! That is presuming" Jackson admonished her and protectively put an arm around April.

"No Jacks. It's OK." She said emptied her glass. " Here. Do you want some? It is delicious!" She Said and offered him a sip of her glass.

"I think you are a little drunk." He whispered in her ear. "Me? NOOO!" She responded. "But I think I have to use the bathroom... would you excuse me, please? She stood up and wanted to go to the bathroom, but lost the balance and nearly fall, but Jackson caught her.

"Careful Apes!" He said.

"Jacks you are always there when I need you. She said drunken and smiled.

"Of course but first we get you to the toilette." Before he left with April to the Toilette, he gave his mother an evil eye and said:

"I think we´re going home after, thanks for all mother..." he said angry. When he stood with April in front of the Toilette entrance, he asked softly:" Can you do that on your own or do you need help in there?"

"Of course Jackson, unless you want to come with me..." she grinned smugly.

" I think I will stay right here an d wait until you done, but call me when you need anything!"

April stummbled into the bathroom. After a while, what felt like for ever, she got out of the bathroom and said:" Ready Jacks, see you? I could do this by myself!" she said proudly.

"So let´s get home and get you in bed, so you can sleep,Apes" Gently Jackson walked with April out to his car. He had to really walk slowly, so that April didn´t stumble... Jackson was really angry about his mother... If she had´t bother April with those intimate questions, she wouldn´t be that drunk...

"Your mother thinks i´m prude Jacks!"

"No, she didn´t. My mother only didn´t know when she is totally out of line!"

"But she´s right, I´m an 28 year old virgin. You´ve been the second guy who ever kissed me." she said drunken.

Jackson grimaced by the memory of punching Alex a few month ago, to defend Aprils honor.

"Our kiss was amazing!" blubbered April out. "I would love to kiss you all the time!" she said grinning and hick upped.

Her words boost his ego. "April, you´re drunk. I will get you home now and we gonna talk tomorrow about this when you´re sober." He opened the door of his car and helped April into the car seat.

"See, I knew that you wouldn´t want to kiss me again..." she mumbled drunken.

"April we´re not gonna talk about this now!" and closed the belt of the car seat.

"It´s okay Jacks, we´re gonna be friends forever!" answered April drunken.

He smiled, brushed her forhead with one´s lips and drove to home.

There arrived, he noticed that April was falling a sleep. He gently unbuckled her seat belt and took her into his arms. Carefully he carried her into her bed and put her high heels off. He also put a full cgass of water on her nightstand and covered her with the sheets.

On the next day Jackson got up and wanted to woke up April but she already left. Probably she had to go to work earlier... he thought... But she must have the biggest hangover of her life. He thought smirking and drove to work as well.

30 minutes later...

As Jackson reached the hospital, the breaking News sounded out of the TV in the entrance hall.

"GHOSTDRIVER CAUSING MULTIBLE COLLSION ON THE HIGHWAY. MANY INJIURED AND IF THERE WHERE DEAD VICTIMS IS NOT CLEAR, ALSO THE NUMBER OF THE INJIURED."

A wave of shock overwhelmed Jackson. It was the same highway that April get used to drive on. He couldn´t move anymore.

Suddenly he saw Mark yelling to the phone. :"What the hell means, you couldn´t tell me about her actual state? You´re fucking paramedics!So you want to say me that she is jammed in the car and you don´t know what to do? We´re coming, don´t move a finger and take care that she´s alive when we arrivethere!" Out of rage Mark hunged up and desperately tried to get a team of sergeants together.

"Mark, what´s up?" asked Jackson. Mark, who was close to tears, answered:" It´s Lexi, she´s got involved into the accident and nobody can give me news about her state but she´s massively injured."

"Oh my gosh!" Jackson gasp and give him a hug.

"I can´t loose her Jackson! I´ve to go to her! God, I was so stupid! I had have told her how much I love her and now I don´t even know if she will survive" Mark buried his face in his hands and burst out into tears.

Jackson felt bad because he couldn´t offer commiseration because of his worries about April. It would be tactless to ask him about April. "Hey Mark, you going to Lexi now and everything gonna be fine!"

Mark nodded, clapped Jackson thankfully on his shoulder and left Seattle Grace.

Jackson asked everyone if they have seen April. Without success. Even Hunt had´t seen April in the morning. Panic overwhelmed

Jackson. Hectically searched for his I Phone and tried to reached April again.. With every free line signal his fear got bigger. He can´t loose April. By this thought he had to puke. He tried it again without success again. At the fourth time he murmured desperately into his phone:" Common April, pick up!"...nothing. "Oh my Gosh, please let her be fine!"

At the same time at the accident location...

Mark was beside oneself with fear. One day before Lexi confessed her love to him and he didn't say anything... and now this happen and he didn't even know if he get the chance te say that he felt the same way... Mark thought.

Worried sick, he asked the paramedics where he could find her:

" Right over there Doctor Sloan. They are discussing how to cut her out, without causing huge blood loss. " One paramedic answered.

"Thanks!" Mark called out and ran to the car wreck.

Lexi was stuck in there and had a huge gaping wound in her abdomen. "Stop, we are doctors! Don't move anything." Meredith shouted. A piece of metal was in her wound and she was hypertensive. "Hey Sweetheart, how you are doing? Don't worry, we'll get you out of here and all will gonna be fine." Mark told her and grabbed her hand.

" Not so well, lexi said steady breathing.i've got it bad... I think I am gonna die. " She whispered. "Don't you dare … you can not die Lex! I love you! We are getting married and have many Slexie kids. " He said, forced out a smile and kissed her hand

. Lexi smiled and whispered. "You don't have to say that, only becauce I am dying.."

" No Lex, I wanted to say that already yesterday, but I was a coward. We are meant to be together Lex. Meant to be. " He whispered and cried silent tears. "You can't die! Do you hear me?!" He said. "Meant to be" She whispered and closed her eyes.

" No, no, no, lex you have to stay awake" God dammit!" He screamed in panic. Yang, Grey, we have to cut her out off her! NOW! " He shouted. "Paramedics, move your asses! A whole team now were working on saving Lexi Grey. After a few minutes (What seems like forever to Mark) they got her out of the car and brought her to Seattle Grace.

Meanwhile at Seattle Grace.

Jackson was freaking out... he was about to drive to the accident place... he searched for his car keys ans wanted to left the hospital, when he saw Mark and the others rushing in with Lexi on a gurney.

"Hey Mark! How is she?" Jackson asked.

"She is alive, but in a critical state...where are you going Avery? " Mark explained and asked him.

" I am gonna drive to the accident place and looking for April. She is used to take the way to go to work and nobody had seen her in the hospital" He explained in a hurry and was about to get outside, when a familiar voice make him stop.

"Hey Jacks you were trying to call me, what do you wanted." April asked

. Jackson couldn't believe his ones eves. It took of his mind to see Apes alive " Thank god April," He gasped. He never was happier to see April. He couldn't help, ran to her, caught her in his arms andd twirled her around.

April giggled in surprise and asked in wonder: " Jacks whats..."

She was interrupted by a passionate kiss.

Jackson kissed her like he was drowning and she was his air to breathe again. The kiss was hot and full of desperate. Jackson put all his insanity, what he had been trough the last hours, in this kiss. The fear, the desperation and the happiness, where overwhelming him. He ended the kiss but was still holding her face between her hands.

"Where have you been? I was looking for you the whole morning... I thought something to... " His voice break. He asked out of breath. His eyes glaze over and a single tear escaped.

"I took a shortcul, because I had to go to the drugstore before work for painkillers, because my head exploded.

Jackson laughed happy in relief and said: "God I never were that happy, that you had a hangover." Now they realizes that ever were looking at then, the whole time. Jackson didn't care, but noticed how April stiffened in his grip and blushed.

"Uhm there is a incoming Trauma... I have to go..." April said nervously.

He didn't want to abash her. " Okay, I'll take a look if I cn help somewhere."

6 hours later...

Lexie was out of mortal danger and conscious now. Mark didn't leave her side and was lovely taking care of her.

After he gave her something to drink, he suddenly knelt down besides her bed, took her had and began to spoke with a voice full of love:

"Lexie Grey, I know I was the biggest idiot in the world and it took me forever to finally realize it... to realize that you are the love of my life, that we are meant for each other and that I wanna be your Husband! I know that is maybe not the best timing to ask you this... but I can't wait any second anmore. Lexi Grey, I wat to spennd my life with you! For better or worse! I want to have many of little, cute Sloans with you! I want to fall asleep besides you and wake up besides you! You are my better half lex! Will you do me that honor and marry me! Mark ended his speech and asked her.

Lexi was totally perplex, stared at hin and started crying:

"OH MY GOD YES!" Lexi said smiling "I am crazy about you Mark Sloan! We are meant to be!" Mark kissed her full of joy.

"So then lets hope that you recover quick, so that we can get married as soon as possible!" He whispered smirking, let her rest and went to his next surgery.

Jackson and Mark met in the OR, while they preparing for surgery.

"Hey, how Is Lexi?"

"Oh Mrs. Sloan is doing great!" Mark answered and grinned bright.

"Wait... Mrs. Sloan...? Have you proposed to her?" Jackson asked and smiled.

"Yep and she said YES and I am the luckiest man in the world!" Mark grinned.

"Congratulation! I am really happy for you!" Jackson said an smiled.

"But now, lets talk about you! What have my eyes seen before?! You kissed Kepner in front of everyone?!" Mark said curios.

"Yeah I know. " Jackson replied quiel.

"You have feelings for her? Am I right?" Mark softly asked.

"Yeah I think so... allthough I don't want it, because it only complicates things between me and her...But the thought that she might could have die... it killed me..." Jackson confessed.

Mark turned around to Jackson: ""I want you to promise me something, if you love someone you tell 'em. Even if you're scared that its not the right thing, even if you're scared that it will cause problems, even if you're scared that it will burn your life to the ground, you say it and you say it loud and then you go from there" After these words, Jackson was more sure than ever...He had to admit to himself that he had feeling for April. He would do everything in his power... to show that he was right for her! 


	4. The whole damn thing

**Hey lovely people:) At first I want to thank everyone that followed/favorite/ reviewed my Story. You really made my day:) and I just want to apologies for the late update. I was really busy with college stuff and this chapter is very long. This chapter contains M rating but we all wanna read some japril smut, right ;) So... as always let me know what you think about the new chapter, I really appreciate your opinion. It means the world to me.**

 **Hope you like it:)**

 **All characters belong to Shonda**

Chapter 4

 **The whole damn thing**

the next 2 days were stressful. April were about 48 hours stuck in the hospital and they weren't able to find a free minute to talk to each other. Jackson wanted to talk about the events of the past two days – but he didn't know how or if he even should bring it up. The fear about April had let him just realized how important she was to him... but he was scared as hell to screw it up... to loose her, if he would go any further and tell her that he developing feelings for her... that he didn´t want to ignore anymore... It was so complicated... maybe he should let things take their course without saying anything... In a couple of minutes he was done with work. He was tiered and exhausted, but was happy to see April again, to spend time with her...

As he arrived at home he took a beer from the fridge and walked around the house. Karev was still in the hospital. On the way to Jackson´s room, Jackson saw April´s room door open. He leaned on the frame of her door and quietly observed her. April laid in bed and read a book. She was so deepened in it, that she didn´t realized that Jackson only was standing there for a couple of minutes and simply looked at her.

"Hey!" he said soft.

"Hey, how was your day?" she asked smiling.

"Urgh, hard and exhausting..." he answered, took a seat on the edge of her bed and took another sip of his beer.

"And yours?" he asked.

"Good!".

"What are you reading?" Jackson asked.

"The Bibel" she answered quietly and a Little bit ashamed of it, because she knew he found her faith ridicules.

"I figures" he answered smirking. "Tell me about it!" he asked her.

"About the Bibel?" she questioned in confusion.

"Yes and why you believing in it. How it become such a great part of your life? We know each other for five years and you didn´t tell me anything of it although it is such a big part of you."

"Did you really wanna know it? I thought you think is reticules" she asked.

"Apes, how could you thing that?" he asked in disbelief. "I don´t think your faith is ridicules. To be honest, I admire you for that." he confessed full of recognition.

She looked at him surprised. "Admire me? Why? There is nothing to admire me..." she said dry.

"I admire that you still able to faith, even of all this miserably and tragic which we seeing every day at the hospital. I admire your strength. Admire that you wears your heart on your sleeve and show your feelings so simply. And that nothing can destroy your faith. I wish I could do the same and I am asking myself how you do it." he explained to her and put his hand above hers.

She smiled and closed her eyes. "You know it´s like the wind... you can´t see it but you feel it! Of course there are misery and injustice in this world but there are also good things in the world. You at first have t know the bad things to appreciate the good things" by these words a smile lit up her face. "I was a nerd at school.. nobody liked me and I had very much to struggle with it, so I found new strength in faith, even if I had no friends, God was always there. He showed me always a way to get trough the sadness. I got aware that I always have to stay true to oneself and that you always have to believe in the good of people or situations, no matter how bad they are. Even the shooting had brought something good out of all his tragedy. "

Jackson gulped. "Charles and Reed are dead! How is that a good thing?" He asked in frustration and took another sip. "

She laid a hand on his cheek "We have found us!" She smiled.

"Me and you." Jackson whispered smiling up to her. "Without you I would have fallen apart."

"You see. And exactly that are miracles. Our friendship is a miracle and a gift. Your trust is a gift. Here is God." She said smiling.

He looked at her full of awe. She was so incredible and beautiful.

"Why you wanna wait until marriage to have sex" It really interested him he wanted to know why she choose it.

"Hmm..." She began. " I think sex is something special. Something sacred. You should be aware what kind of act of confidence it is to show yourself bare and vulnerable in front of someone else and even to share intimacy. It is a big deal for me... so... I think that is why I want to wait. I want to give this faith to someone special. Who really loves me and the person who will agree to marry me annoying thing, have to really love me!" She said and chuckled.

" April your nuts!" Jackson respond smiling and emptied his beer. "come, lets order pizza and watch a movie." He stood up with her and and cradled her.

"Sounds like a great plan Who choose the movie?"

"Your time to pick!" He said.

" Okay, then we're watching a walk to remember." She grinned.

"Oooh nooo. Not another Nicholas Sparks Movie." He groaned but smiled.

"Plllleeeaaassee. It is sooo amazing... you'll see.. Please." She pleaded with her hazel eyes.

"Only because it is you." How could he say no to her, when she looked at him like that... He thought and went to the living room

At the end of the movie a whole package of tissues were empty. Jackson couldn't help but smirked and handle the last tissue to her.

"Isn't the movie wonderful?"She asked and dried her tears.

" I really have to admit... yeah... it was nice... but that doesn't mean we are wathing romance movies every time." He said and put his arm around her. She laughed and laid her head on his shoulder. "No! Next time you choose." She said.

"deal. Do you have a list of wishes, too?" jackson suddenly asked curios.

April looked up at him and answered: "Not exactly a list... but I have some wishes for my are you asking?"

"No reason... you just reminded me a bit of Jamie... That is all.." Jackson answered. " So what are your wishes?" He asked again.

" Hmm... to get married... in a field of flowers with butterflies is on the first place... to experience a miracle... "

Jackson smiled.

" Then... go dancing... to be weightless... and go camping!" She finished with a smile.

"Camping?" He asked in wonder.

"Yup I am a farmers daughter and I love the nature sooo that is why I wanna go camping." She explained..

" OK all things except f being weightless are realizable. "

" Yeah that is right... if I were not me!" She whispered sadly. Jackson cradled her even more.

"I think I am gonna go to bed... it is late... Good night Jackson... thank you for the nice evening!" She said and gave him a kiss on his cheek before she left the room.

Jackson watched her leaving. Lets look what we can do... at least the camping wish he could realize. He would call Sheppard and asked for days off for him and April. He went to sleep as well.

2 days later

April came home in the Afternoon after work and was surprised to see a big traveling bag laying in the living room.. Ahe raised a brow and thought: Does Karev travel somewhere with one of his chicks..?

"April, is that you" Jackson called and rushed the stairs down.

"Uh... yes... why are all those Traveling bags here? Did we finally have a break of Karev?" She asked and grinned.

"No it is way better than that!" Jackson grinned. "I spoke with Sheppard and because we were working a couple of days in row, he allow us to take 4 days off... so I thought, we go camping. He said smiling. It took a moment for her to realize, but then a huge smile spread over her face.

"Your kidding; right?" She asked in disbelief.

"Does this... look like I am kidding?" He asked playfully serious.

She grinned even brighter and jumped with a loud laughter of happiness into Jackson's arms. He didn't expected her to be this happy... and it warmed his heart. He put her into a tight hug.

April loosen her grip and "I have to pack! I don't even know what I am supposed to take with me!" April chirped in excitement.

"You don't have to worry about that. I already pack some stuff. You only have to pack some casual clothes I even thought of packing your wash bag." He said proudly.

" You are the best Jacks! I will hurry!"

4 hours later on the Camping place

April looked around the camping place and was fascinated about the beauty of the nature. "Jackson it is beautiful here!" She whispered in awe. "I thought you would like it. That is why I choose this place." He said. He just built the two tents. "Do you want to go for a walk until the sun goes down?"

"Sure but didn't you think it will be raining?" He asked.

"Even when, we are not made from sugar!" She answered.

"Yeah, you right. It would be probably good to take a walk after such a long ride." So they went along the river and enjoyed the view of nature and the chirping of the birds and were talking about anything and everything. "It is really beautiful here Jackson! Thank you for doing this for me..." said April after a while and turned around to face Jackson.

"You´re welcome, at least one wish a could realized for you."

April smiled from ear to ear and couldn´t help but kissed him lightly and happily.

Before Jackson could react, April backed up in shock. "Oh Jacks, sorry I didn´t want it!" She hectically gestured with her arms and nervously bit down her underlip.

"It´s okay Apes, it´s not that we have never done that before..." Jackson answered, grinned mischievously and stepped closer to her. Again the time stopped and tension between them was unbearable. April didn´t know what to respond or what to do. She only knew that she wanted to kiss Jackson more then anything else... Her eyes darkened, she lift her hand to his neck and kissed him again.

Now Jackson could react. He hold her face in his hands and deepened the kiss. It was like the kiss would last hours. Both of them are inhaling the moment as it was the last of their lives. They didn´t even noticed the rain which stormed down under. Just if it thunders they both startled.

"Shit, we´ve to go back! I forgot to close my tent, fuck!" Jackson cursed. They ran back to the camping place as Jackson thought his tent was open and flooded with water, even his sleeping sack. "Shit, what are we doing now?"

"You could sleep in my tent!"April suggested. "But we only have one sleeping sack..." Jackson interjected.

"It´s okay, I trust you... Come let´s go inside..." As they where in the tent April said: "Could you turn around, please? I´ve to change my wet closes in my sleeping clothes."

"Sure, no problem!"Jackson turned around.

April began to undress herself. Jackson was some how nervous. He was never nervous in such situations. He had never a problem about changing clothes in front of everyone... Had never a problem about nakedness... No matter if it was his own or women nakedness. But even though this situation was different. He was nervous and curious. Jackson couldn´t help but he cast a quick glance. He saw April´s bare back. She didn´t wear a bra and saw her well-formed booty, which she already covered up with a short pantie. He quickly turned around, so that she didn´t caught him glancing.

"I´m finished, you can turn around now. Do you like to put on some dry clothes either? Otherwise you could get sick!" She asked in concern.

"Yes, but all my clothes are in my car right now and if i´m carrying them here by now, they will be also get wet. Do you mind if I take my clothes of?" April´s face blushed immediately.

"Oh no,no, not completely! I let my boxers on, of course!" He explained.

"No no, it´s okay!"

So Jackson put his shirt and his wet Jeans of and stood only with his boxers on in front of April. April couldn´t take her eyes of his gorgeous, define body. She has seen his naked chest a couple of time in the changing rooms but this time it was different, because all these things happened between them. She tried to get herself together and said: "I think we can go to sleep or try if it would work out with both of us in the sleeping sack."

They climbed into it. It was very small and tight but they still found enough place in it. They tried it with spooning each other but April just realized that her bud in this position indecent pressed against his lumber. So she turned around and faced hi. Their bodies where know only inches away from another. She said quietly: "I think that should work, if you don´t mind."

"No, it´s cool Apes!" So they laid a while and listened to the pouring rain. I was calming. The insecurity left and they relaxed and felt save.

Suddenly April whispered " Thank you, Jacks."

" For what, Apes? Jackson asked.

"For this. We´re camping now."

Jackson chuckled and answered: "My pleasure, Apes." He brushed her forehead with ones lips. If he could he would do anything for her. In the past days Jackson got more aware of it, how much April meant to him. That there are feelings he never knows before. He never felt this intense feelings for a woman and that scared the shit out of him. But on the other hand he was helpless against this feelings. As he lay like that beside her and she looked at him so happy and shiny, he could feel that he more and more was falling for her. Jackson stroke a strain of her hair out of her face. He thought back to the events of the last days. He almost lost her. Without knowing it, he spoke out loud. It was only a slight murmur

" What?" April asked.

"I thought I had lost you." Jackson repeated. "The thought of losing you and not having you in my life anymore, kills me." he whispered.

April met his gaze. The painful look in his eyes touched her soul.

Now there was it... The tension... again... she thought. Jackson leaned forward and kissed her gently. April blushed and asked quietly:

"What does this means for us, Jackson?"

"I don´t know. I´m scared. "

" I´m not good at this, Jacks."

"At what?"

"This all. It confuses me. I don´t wanna lose you, if I screw up at this!"

"You can´t screw up anything, Apes. I will be forever your best friend, no matter where this takes us, because I can´t imagine a life without you. The point is that I feel something... something between us that I can´t and want ignore anymore."

April was overwhelmed by his words and couldn´t breath. She could´t believe that this is happening right now... That someone like Jackson tell these words to HER... She was so scared that she wouldn´t be enough for him or just screw up it because she didn´t know how to act in such situations...

"I´m scared, Jackson!"

"Me, too Apes. Scared as hell... but to lay beside you and not kissing you is nearly impossible..."

"Than why you don´t?"

Jackson grinned and kissed her full of passion. He gently nibbled on her underlip. He took her face in both of his hands and noticed how April smiles under his lips. This only fueled him more to deepened the kiss slowly. His tongue played with her lips and found his way to hers. He felt that he needed the moment like fresh air in his lungs. Then longer the kiss last ,then more he fall into this essential feeling.

In April´s head all spun around. She could´t think anything. Jackson was like the forbidden apple of garden Eden but it felts so right. Every touch every second felt so damn right. The worst of it was that she wanted more. Her hands wandered upon his back and felt his muscles under her fingers. Now Jackson let off of her lips, but only because he wanted to kiss her long neck gently. He felt her racing pulse against his lips and nibbled gently on her soft skin. April moaned enjoyable. Now his hands wandered slowly over the sides of her back and gently caress along her castle arch. April shivered by his touch. As his fingers met her bare skin it was like she was on fire. Desperately April searched for his lips and found them. She grabbed his head with both hands and put all of her feelings in this kiss. The fear, the desire, the insecurity. Jacksons hands slit under her tank top and stroke gently over her rips and her belly. Her hand rested a while under Aprils breast without touching it. Then he noticed that she stiffened.

"Jackson, wait." She whispered.

Jackson laid his forehead to hers and his hands slowly slit above her tank top again. "Sorry, Apes." he whispered and kissed her forehead. He rolled to the side and leaned his head on his forearm and looked up on her. He didn´t want to push her. He hasn´t had himself carry away so far by the moment. He knew that this is all new for her and that he had to be careful. Furthermore he respected her wishes and priorities and didn´t want that she felt uncomfortable. April looked up at him and nervously bite her lip. "Jacks, this is all new for me. I´m sorry.."

"I´ts okay Apes I get it." he said and gently stroke her cheek with his thumb.

"What do you think, if we trying to get some sleep now and tomorrow if the weather is fine, we go hiking or do what ever you wanted yo do!"

"That would be great!" She answered smiling and laid her head beside him. Jackson put her closer so himself, so that her head rested on his chest.

"Sleep well, Apes. Sweet dreams."

"You, too." April whispered and closed her eyes.

April woke up in the morning and noticed that her arms and legs were inter wined with Jacksons again. But this time it didn't feel uncomfortable. The near of his body and the warmth more give her a feeling of peace. She smiled.

Now she recognized that Jackson was already awake and looking down on her.

"Morning, Apes." He put her closer to his chest.. Jackson took a look on his Rolex. : "oh, it is already 11am. . We hadn't sleep that long since... forever" He smirked. "How do you sleep?" He asked then.

"Heavenly!" She said and closed her eyes.

"What do you think of me making breakfast, while you getting dressed?"

"Do we have coffee, because I am dying without?" April asked.

"I could very oldschool make fire to get warm water, to make instant coffee or I can can get the thermo and we can drink old coffee?" He laughed. "So then the choice is clear! Istant-Coffee... so lets go and set the fire on!" By these words Jackson remembered the last night. He closed his eyes, kissed Aprils temple and stood up. He grabbed for his old clothes, but they were still wet., so he was up to left the tent in his boxers, but who cares... they where alone... He thought.

"I'll go make coffee."

"In your boxers?" She asked with a raised brow.

" Yup my clothes are still wet and we are alone..."

"It is not like you have to be ashamed of your body." The words slipped out before she could stop it.. she blushed. Why my mouth is always faster then my brain... She thought.

"I can only return the compliment!" Jackson answered and grinned smugly.

" You can't compare this... to THIS" she answered and gestured between their bodies.

Jackson shook his head... April had such a low self esteem...why she couldn't see herself in that way like he did?... She was pure beauty...pure and full of kindness... even the things he don't like... he adores...He wish he could show her, how really beautiful she was... on the inside and on the outside... he will try anything to show her that. As he found some timber for the fire, he got back to the tent and saw Aprils naked backside. April didn't noticed him standing there, He couldn't help, but had to stare and appreciate this sight. Hell yes... she was beautiful.. even the freckles on backside were adorable...As she tried her cotton panty and bra on, he left the tent, because he didn't want to embarrass her. She got out of the tent just a couple of seconds later and came to the fireplace.

"Apes I need a lighter,, do you have one?" "No but I have some matches! I get them! I will be right back!" She said and came back with it.

Jackson lighted the fire and in the April brought some water and a pot out of the tent and handled it to him.

"Thanks Apes!" so now Jackson build a nature oven and made coffee for them. He kneeled besides April who was sitting on the waterside and was watching the water. "It is so peaceful here... I Don't wanna go back... " She said after a moment. "Me either! I understand why you want to come here" Jackson said huskily. April laid her head on his shoulder and smiled. He kissed her temple. The idyllic moment was gone as they heard the water boiling.

" I make the coffee!" Jackson stood up, get the coffee ready and handled April her cup with fresh coffee.

"Thanks!"

"Your welcome!" He kneeled down again and took a small sip. "What do you think if we go swimming in the lake after the breakfast?"

"That would be nice, but have you thought of swim clothes?"

"Yes I actually do!"

" Which swimsuit do you pack for me and you have planed this, right?" she asked with a smirk. "yup, and a got your dark green bikini."

"Oh." she said simply. "No, swimsuit? "

"No false modesty! Besides we´re alone here, no one will see you and I think you´re beautiful. If

it´s up to me, we could swim naked." He said.

April swallowed up. Jackson grinned in amusement and clapped her back.

"No reason to swallow." he said smiling.

"I don´t think that anyone want to see that."

"You´re very much mistaken there!" he answered quiet so that you barely could´t hear it, but April did. He looked up on her with his eyes full of desire. His glance touched April in her bones. She couldn´t stand his gaze and looked down to the floor.

Jackson noticed Aprils´s discomfort and suggested: "Come let´s go to the lake now until the weather is fine."

"Okay I will go change my clothes."

"And I get to the car for my clothes then we can go."

Jackson and April went to the lake. April wore a blue neck holder summer dress and ballerina shoes. Jackson wore short, wine red trousers which exposed his muscular, taut calves. As they arrived at the river side, April climbed out of her dress, so that Jackson could see her in the bikini now. Yes, it was definitely the right decision, he thought... He took his clothes off as well and grabbed her from behind, took her in his arms and screamed loud:" " Let´s get wet!" and jumped with her into the lake. She shrieks in surprise and happiness. As soon as the landed in the water, April ripped out of his grip and screamed: "Oh wait, this means revenge!" and dipped Jackson under the water, Jackson gasped for air and payed it back to her. He grabbed her and playfully threw her into the water.

"You think you´re the king here?" her fighting spirit was awake.

She grinned and darted at Jackson. At the trial to dip him under water, she wrapped her legs around his waste. He wrapped his arms around her.

"Seems like you loose...but this here... is much better..." he whispered suspicious in her ear. He put her closer to him and nibbled gently on her sensitive neck. April shivered and laid her head on his shoulder.

"That's right, it is much better..." She whispered back in his ear. Jackson couldn't help, but grinned and chuckled into her neck, while he placed floatingly kisses on her neck. He found the spot that drove her crazy and softly sucked at it. April sighed in pleasure. Her hand slit to his back. He gently nibbled on her earlobe, while his hand found her well formed backside and gently grabbed it. He knows he have to be careful, but his desire for her was unbearable, he have to touch her skin and explore her. He was relieved that she was still relaxed and sighing in pleasure... he was glad, he didn't overstep any bounds.

April couldn't think anymore. Her blood pounds in her ears. All she could fell was his hot breath against her neck and ear and his his strong hands on her backside.

"Jackson" She moaned. Her hands went to his skull and gentle tickled it, with her fingertips. She couldn't resist the urge of kissing him anymore and brushed her lips hungrily over his.

This caused Jackson to shudder. He deepened the kiss and his body was on fire. Her new self confidence surprised him and turned him on. He pulled back from the kiss, looked at her, his eyes filled with desire and awe for her. He gently put a strain out of her face: " You are so beautiful!" He whispered huskily. And kissed her again. Every time he kissed or touched her, it was like a current of electricity was passing through her entire body... She knew this was a dangerous path. But she didn't care...at least at the moment...She forgot all what was around her and something, that felt, that can not be bad right... she thought while she completely dedicated oneself into the kiss. Now her hands became curios and went all over his back, rested over his backside as well. Clearly fueled by her new curiosity and eagerness, Jackson pulled her even tighter against him. Now a lustful groan escaped of his lungs as he claimed her lips. His hands loosen the grip of her booty and began exploring every inch of her pale skin. They slid slowly to her back, seductively caress it and went to her backside over her waist..

this tender touch make her shiver. "Jackson" She whimpered and let her head fall on his shoulder. In the hey day of passion they didn't notice that they were now on the riverside again. Jackson felt a resistance behind his back and let off of Aprils back and held her face in his hands. Before a couple of weeks he had never imagined him and April in such situation, eager, devote, consuming by passion, with barely clothes on,wet and full of trust in his arms... Never before he had felt such an intensity with a woman, the urge to be close to her, to feel her against him, to touch her. ..

April woke this whole new feelings inside of him... As he trailed kisses over her neck and her collarbone, slit his hands to her stomach, tickled her navel. When Jacksons finger slightly slipped under the waistband of her bikini, April stiffen.

He seemed to pick up on her discomfort and ask in concern: "What is wrong Apes?"

April got scared now because of her inexperience... but was ashamed of it... so she stumbled: " Nothing,i just think that some bug climbed over my leg...Maybe we just go out of the water?"

"Of course Apes, if you want so..." He said gently He couldn't help but smirk, when she didn't see itt. It was clear that there was no bug... He maybe just overstepped bounds and she got scared and he felt sorry for it. But he was amused by Aprils excuses.

She entwined her legs of his waist and gt out of the lake. Jackson followed her. So they both got dressed.

She couldn't believe she just made out with Jackson in the lake... and smiled, lost in her thoughts … and she liked it... a lot... she had to admit...where this is going? She asked herself. But maybe she just had to trust Jackson in this... he looked so damn good... She thought and glaned over him.

"Did you wanna go for a walk, before we go back to the camping place?" Jackson asked.

"Sure!"

He put an arm around her shoulder and so they walk around the place.

"Are you happy with our camping holidays?" He asked after a while.

"More than happy! I couldn't be grateful enough." She answered with a bright smile.

"Your Welcome." He said and smiled. How does that grep you, if we make a campfire this evening?"

"And you read horror stories out loud?" she asked grinning.

"No, not that. I´m not really a great story teller but we can roast marshmallows and I got a ghetto blaster, so we can listen to some music."

"Sounds like great plan!" Ao they enjoyed the idyllic silence of the ambiance before they went back to their camping place.

As the darkness fell Jackson started to prepare the campfire. He enjoyed the camping holidays itself. Of course because he went here with April but it was also just relaxing to enjoy and live this simple and nature without any stress and trouble of a big city and the every day pressure. When he was ready with the campfire and lit it on, he put the marshmallows out of his bag. He saw April standing in front of the tent.

"I was just about to pick you up and tell that the campfire is ready." said Jackson smiling.

She had changed her clothes in to a black skinny jeans and a dark blue shirt. Her hair hung in loose curls around her face and her pale skin of her neck bathed in the soft glow of the moonlight. She looked fucking amazing... Jackson thought.

They went towards the campfire, sat in the grass.

"Oh, wait a minute. I just get the ghetto blaster and two blankets if it gets cold." Jackson came back with the ghetto blaster and a self made mix which he made for the camping holidays with April´s favorite songs on it. Maybe that´s a little bit cliché but he was already acting like a horny teenager, so who cares... He thought. The first song was _"the scientist- of Coldplay"_

"I didn´t know that you like Coldplay." She said surprised.

"I don´t like Coldplay. It´s a Mixtape _for_ you, which a made for our holidays with all your favorite songs." "

You know, what my favorite songs are?"

"Of course, we´re living together and we´re friends since five years." he handed her a marshmallow to roast.

"I never understood, why YOU had become friends with me, because the others thought that i´m annoying and pesky."

"You were the only one treat me like Jackson and not like an Avery. I appreciated it a lot. I still do. We´re both in the same boat. We both have to fight against prejudices. Nobody sees who we really are, only our labels. Besides of you. Same difference. Me and you and it´s gonna be for ever like this." He looked straight in to April´s eyes.

"Yeah. Me and you." she respond smiling.

"You have way much destroyed self-concept anyway. I wished you could see yourself like I did." "It´s hard when The others exactly show you the opposite." she whispered, more to herself then to him.

"I know Apes." he whispered back. Now he noticed her shaking and wrapped a blanket around her shoulders tenderly.

"Here Apes." he said and soothing her arms.

"Thank you." April answered quietly. But now he saw April´s tearful eyes.

"Apes... Hey..." he saT beside her and pulled her closer to him. "Why are you crying?" After his question she started sobbing bitterly.

"Hey... sssshhh...shhh.." he whispered in her haIr.

"Sorry Jackson." She cracked out.

"No need to be sorry... but what is wrong Apes?" He asked soft his voice full of empathy and concern while he gently soothing her back.

"I don't even know... it is all overwhelming me... this whole beauty... the happiness... She began to explain and sniffled.

"Why are you overwhelmed?" Jackson asked quiet. " As I said... I don't know. My whole life I was being teased... not noticed... I had to fight for being accepted...for majesty... I never was used to happiness... and then you come along... my favorite person...who is suddenly overwhelming me with all these wonderful moments and feelings." She began to gesticulate.

"Does that mean I am overwhelming you? Apes look at me please" Jackson asked and forced her to look at him.

She looked up and met his blue-green gaze She saw so much tenderness, but also fear.

"Yes and no. somehow you do... I don't know what I am supposed to do now... I am not good at it... there is so much to loose... I don't wanna loose you Jackson... " Her eyes filled with tears again.

He gently stroke her cheek which was wet from tears He leaned forward and kissed her forehead.

" You are never gonna loose me... as I said... me and you... we are standing forever... no matter how!" He whispered and that is true. She was it!... Always. He only didn't see it before... while they sat there arm in arm, in the background the sound of chasing cars of Snow Patrol, theY saw a falling star.

" Make a wish..." Jackson whispered in her ear. April chuckled and said.

"I don't need tto make a wish I am already happy!" She smiled at Jackson. He respond the smile and asked curios: "What is with your other wishes for life? Do you don't want them to become true?

"Of course but I don't believe they will."

" Oh come on.. you always saying that you never have to loose your faith... how do you imagine your dream wedding or your dream engagement for example? In a church? Am I right? Jackson asked.

"No, it didn't have to... sure get married in a church is wonderful, but god is everywhere... it didn't have to be a church for the presence of god at a wedding." Jacksson smiled and rested his head on her hair and listened. My dream wedding would be in a field of flowers with butterflies, where we get married by a minister and saying our vows... personal vows... not these formal vows... vows which really fits for the person who you marry and what you wished for your marriage... let your heart speak..."

"That's wonderful..." Jackson murmured in her hair. He had to admit, that _we_ sonded really good, but he knew she meant it general.

"And your dream engagement?" He asked further.

"Absolutely NO flash mob." She laughed. " I'd rather prefer something personal, where your partner really thought of you. Why he wanna marry you... and for example gets me surprised, by a ring in a glass of champagne... and not with tones of people dancing around me and being forced to say yes... I want to say yes with all of my heart..." Jackson murmured in her hair. "I hate flash mobs, too.

"Finally a thing that we have in common!" She said with a smirk. He smacked her shoulder playfully and let out a clear laugh. "Hey I think we have more in common than you think... I couldn't ever imagine to be without you, Apes..." He admitted.

When she met his gaze he spoke further: " I know this is all confusing for you... for us...but if something that... good... and right... so why don't give it a chance..."

Aprils eyes widened and she hold her breath.

"What do you mean Jacks?" She asked, her eyes looked at him with anticipation.

"I mean that I want the whole damn thing... I don't want to ignore the feelings I have for you any longer...I don't want to tiptoe around you and have to think three times about if I may allow to kiss... whenever I feel the urge to touch your beautiful lips with mine, or when ever I think you may want me to kiss you... "He looked at her with a steady gaze. Full of tenderness and sincerity.

"I Don't want this anymore... I want you... I Wanna be with and hold your hand in the hospital...I wanna look at you and let myself just... be... I know it is maybe a bad timing... to blurred it out...because you already overwhelmed...but if not, then when...? I just wanna look where this is takeing us..." He ended his speech.

April sill looked at hin in wonder. She couldn't believe her ears... before she could respond something Jackson spoke again:" Do you wanna to give us a chance Apes?... I mean... If you don't have feelings for me, we can be only friends...but I have to say it loud... because I can't think about anything else right now!"

She would have never imagined... that Jackson really could have feeling for her... She had wished it in secret as she saw the falling star... but she has never thought that it could be... She thought

She felt the tears coming again.

"What if we didn't make it work? What if I screw it up?" She asked in fear. He stroke her cheek. "You don't, you couldn't... please... give us a chance!" He pleaded huskily.

" If you're feel nearly the same way, then let me prove you... that... this... is right!?" He gestured between them and looked straight in her fearful eyes. Jackson gulped and was scared of her respond. He didn't know what has possessed him, to blurred it out right now. But this was the way he felt right now...he knew it overwhelmed her... he could see it...but he had to tell her... But all his hopes could fall apart by her answer...

When April was sill silent after a couple of seconds, he whispered in fear: "Apes?"

She smiled happy, a new wave of tears stream down her cheeks and answered. "How could you not be sure about it?!" She gently grabbed his face and kissed him passionate. Jackson smiled under her lips and wrapped his arms around her. He was happier then ever...it felt like to be home...he loved her... that became more and more clear for him... he always have... not since the terrible evening...not since their first kiss... not since the camping holidays... he loved her since the first time he saw her.. but it took him an eternity to finally realized it... but he couldn't say these three words to her now.. he was to scared...he wanted to take this step and he was sure about it. But he was so scarred, too. So, he put all his feelings in the kiss.

April let out an euphoric laughter, when she lost her balance and felt into the grass by his story kiss. April let off his lips, put her hands around his neck. "

Does this really happen now?" she whispered smiling from ear to ear. A smile which warmed Jacksons heart.

He stroke a hair stain out of her face and said smiling: " Yes and it will work out. I believe in it"! He pecked her lips.

She grinned mischievous. "I thought you didn't believe?"

"I believe in you, I believe in us.." She smiled and kissed him hungrily.

A rush of desire ripped through her body. She felt the adrenaline pouting in her veins. She felt like she could take over the world right now. Their kisses became more desperate. Suddenly all seems right for April. Her hands slowly went under his hoodie. She needed to touch his skin. She pulled back from the kiss and whispered: "Lets go inside!"

"Are you cold?"

She shook her head and bit her bottom lip in anticipation, her eyes sparkled mischievously.

"Lets go inside!" Se repeated. He couldn't believe what he just heard. But her words still lingered in his head. Was she serious or did he misinterpret it, because all he could think about right now , is to feel April underneath him...naked... he could how ready he was...he was more than hard. By this thoughts his eyes darkened with lust.

He felt April shudder.

She felt like Jackson been ripping her clothes of with his eyes. His eyes were full of temptation promises. He leaned his head down and kissed her neck and pulled her closer to him.

Rushed by another wave of anticipation, she rolled Jackson onto his back and straddled him, met his gaze, kissed him hard and moved her hips seductively.

A load groan escaped Jacksons mouth. If she wouldn't stop this, he wasn't sure if he had any self control to resist the urge of deflowering her outside on a camping place.

Laying in the grass. She kissed him hot. Her lips went to his neck, gently nibbling his skin. Her hands pushed his hoodie up to get access to his skin. As her finger gently began to play with the hair under his navel and the waistband of his trousers,

Jackeson hissed and breathed: "April, wait."

She stopped, met his gaze and asked full of insecure: " Do you not want me?"

Jackson groaned in frustration. He couldn't believe that this is happening. That he really was about to say no to her. But she deserved so much more than a hot fuck outside in the grass.

"Babe you don't how much I want you... but not like this..." He whispered huskily.

"Then lets go inside!" She answered, kissed him and desperately put his bottom lip between her teeth and gently bit it. That was too much for him... he capitulate and wrapped his arms around her "Your wish is my command!" He breathed in her ear and stood up, holding her tight.

April shrieked in anticipation and laughed. She wrapped her legs around her waist and deepened the kiss.

Without breaking the kiss, he carried her to the tent and laid himself slowly down onto the sleeping bag with her. April giggled. Jackson looked into her eyes. Searching for a permission and answers. But he only saw desire mixed with a little insecurity in her eyes.

April couldn't stand his glance of appraisal and was about to pull his shirt off.

He get that hint and pulled his shirt off. She looked at him in awe. He was so beautiful she thought... Jackson leaned down and kissed her again. His hands roamed over her upper body and pulled her shirt up. He kissed her neck, her cleavage and murmured her name. She leaned up, so he could easily pull off her shirt. Now she laid in front off him with her bra on, he admired it a moment, he wanted to brand this sight in his memory.

"You are so incredibly beautiful!" He breathed out in awe.

She blushed and got insecure by his words. She never found herself beautiful, but the way he looked at her made her stomach twisted with nerves.

He leaned over her again and kissed her . Gently nibbling on her neck her collarbone and her cleavage. Her little sighs were like music in his ears. She was so susceptible to his touch. This made him proud. He placed kisses on the way down her belly. As he noticed how much it turned her on, he repeated the game with his tongue tip.

"Jackson." She moaned: "Do you like that?" He asked.

"hmm hmm." She let out. He smirked his hands roamed over her body again. She is so amazing and she didn't even know it and it was his mission to change that. She should know how desirable and beautiful she was to him. He glance at her, stoke a stain out of her face and leaned his forhead at hers.

"Do you have the slightest idea, how breathtakingly beautiful you are?" he whispered. His voice full of reverence .

She shook her head and he smile by that response .

His lips went to her ear and whispered: " You are perfect April! Every little freckle of you drive me crazyy!" He gently wandered along her collarbone with his fingertips. He followef the way with his lips. His hand went along her cleavage

" Your breast... so perfect..." one hand cupped one of her breasts.

"Just pefect..." He breathed and gently caressed her breast. He noticed that she felt uncomfortable. He leaned forward and asked: " Hey sweetheart, what is wrong?" he gently put her facen betwee his hands.

" Do you want to stop?" He asked in concern and empathy. She shook her head. "What is it then?" He asked soft.

She redden and said. "It is just... I aan never done this... well.. nobody ever touched me like this... " She admited in embarrassment, flushed and avoid his gaze.

"Hey, lookat me... please?" He pleaded softly.

When she finally looked at him he said: "Apes... you cat tell me anything.. we didn't have to rush anything...and... to be honest... I really like the fact, that I am the first that ever touched your breasts... just tell me what you want, or if you don't like what I am doing" He kissed her softly.

"Do you want to stop?" He asked.

"No... just go slow?"

"As slow as you want too" He answered, smiled and kissed her soft.

Slow and adoringly he let his hand roam over her body again. He covered her neck with kisses and stopped on a very sensitive spot on her neck, to gave it more attention and was immediately with a small moan of April.

"Jackson?"

"Yes?" She gently took his hand and put it over her breast. "Touch me!"

Jackson looked up at her his eyes filled with desire.

"Touch me... I wanna feel your hands on me... Teach me..."

By her words all blood off Jackson went down to his cock. He almost painful slowly began to massage her breasts over the fabric of her lace bra slowly caressing her nipples, which instantly erect.

She was so sensitive... he thought and studied her face... he love to see April in pleasure...he leaned forward and kissed her long and slow.

April deepened the kiss... she wanted more... Jackson let her feel things... change her... and she doesn't wanna stop it...her tongue parted his lips, found his and played with it. Jacksons guttural groan, fueled her and she started kissing his neck, nibbled seductively at it and nibbled his ear lob and tickled it teasingly with her tongue tip. She turned him on his back and straddled him again. Jackson didn't complained.

She began to explore his chest with her lips and tongue.

Jackson closed his eyes in pleasure. God she was the purest temptation and she didn't even know it...which affect she had on him. It was different like at the other women, he had been with...every kiss of her, every desired look made his blood boil in pleasure... he wanted her more than anything else...April noticed Jacksons state of pleasure and continued her exploring tour. Like he did before, she gave his nippled the same attention. Her lips went down, following his muscle flexing. Maybe Jesus wouldn't understand her choice, well, she thought so... but she loves Jackson... that is all she had to know... her hands slip down and tried to open his belt. But before she could open it, she felt Jacksons hands above hers. She looked up at him in confusion.

"Wait..." He said, leaned forward and whispered huskily: "At first... let me take care of you..." He wrapped his arms around her and flipped her on her back. He kissed her opened the buttons of her Jeans and slowly pulled her out of it. He admired every centimeter of bare skin, which he discovered. She was breathtaking... it took all his willpower to go slow now. His hands caressed her legs and thighs. April shivered under is touch. This was torture... sweet and unbearable at the same time. She was helplessness and enjoyed it...but she wanted to touch him, so desperately...

"Jackson, please!" She whimpered. "let me touch you..."

"I am sorry, but you have to be patient" Now he brushed small kisses along her inner thighs.

April sight in frustration, flipped him around and straddled him. "Enough wait!" She said with a triumph smile.

Jackson grinned: " A little impatient Miss Keppner huh?"

"That is an understatement!" she kissed him hungry and continue kissing his chest and belly. Jackson couldn't think anymore.

His hands went to her head, fisting through her hair. But then misgivings appeared... was this right...she deserved more and wasn't that kind of woman, who you deflowered in a tent.. but the feeling of her lips on his skin... he pushed the concerns aside... al least for now... and gave in that incredible feeling...

"Am I doing it right?" April asked between kisses.

"More than right!" He breathed out.

April went her way down and her backside rubbed accidentally against his growing erection. She felt how ready he was and opened his belt. She felt a little unsure, but her lust was bigger than her insecurity. She pulled his jeans off and his big erection covered by his boxers.

Jackson suddenly sat up and said: "April, wait..."

"Why...? Am I doing something wrong?"

"No, you don't!"

"So why you want me to stop?" She looked confused.

" This is not right..." He said soft: April felt like he slapped her.

"Do you not want me?" She asked suppressing the urge to cry.

" I want you more than anything now!" He answered and took her face between his hands. "But I don't want that you will regret it... you deserve better than this...much more.. "

" Jackson just be honest and admit that you don't like it...because I am inexperienced and I am doing all wrong! " She said angry.

Jacksons eyes widened. Did she really think that...? How the hell could she...?

"What! No! For gods sake..

. of course I liked it...!"

April didn't believe a word. "You know what! Forget it!" she said and wiped upcoming tears away, before he could see them. She just want to flew out of this situation and grabbed her clothes.

"If you had liked it that much, we wouldn't have this conversation now. You hadn't rejected me! How stupid of me to think you didn't have a problem with my lack of experience." She snapped at him, tears running down her cheeks .

"April wait!" He tried to grab her but she pulled back.

"Get off. I'll get it!... I have to go out of here!" She said and escaped out off the tent, before Jackson could see more tears.

"Damn it! April please wait!" He yelled after her, quickly closed his jeans and ran after her.

"There is nothing to talk about anymore! You already said everything I Had to know! So please let my GET out off this situation!" She cried out.

Now Jackson finally reached her arm and forced her to turn to him "

What do you have to say to me?!" She yelled.

"April, it is not what you think!" Jackson began.

"Well; how is it then?" She snapped.

"You are so much worth than this..." She rolled her eyes.

" OK Jackson just forget it! I should have never ask you to go in the tent with me!"

Jackson felt helpless... he didn't know how he could explain to her, that it wasn't an act of rejection, it was an act of respect... of love...he didn't know what he could say, to make her understand...His looked at her... his eyes full of sympathy. He looked at her and to see her cry, so much hurt... broke his his heart...

So he blurred out: "I love you April!...Do you understand?... I love everything about you!... Even the things I don't like... I love..."

April looked at him in disbelief and couldn't say anything, she just stared at him.

"That why I wanna to wait... because I love you and I want it to be special... you let me feel things like no other woman before...that is why I want our first time special... unique... it has to be unforgettable for you... for us..." He stepped closer and wiped her tears away: "I didn't mean to hurt you. I am soo sorry April..." And kissed her forehead.

It doesn't matter that she didn't say those 3 words back. He didn't expect it, even though he crave for those words...a moment they looked into each others eyes, without saying anything...

After a while Jackson broke the silence and said sincerely: "You don't have to say anything now, but just don't run away from me again!" He smiled at her.

He pulled her into his arms and said soft: " Come lets go inside" He noticed how her body shook. April didn't know what to think... Jackson loved her...? And why the hell she couldn't respond anything to him? She was... frozen. Even though her dream became true...it was like her throat was cut, she felt unable to speak.

"Jackson." She whispered.

He turned his face and looked at her. Without saying anything, she took his face in her hands and kissed him. She put all words she couldn't say right now in the kiss.

Jackson felt it and kissed her with the same intensity back.. and this was enough for him for now...as they were back in the tent, Jackson put his Jeans off and cradled with April in the sleeping bag.

He pulled tight to his chest and kissed the top of her head and stroke her hair.

"April... would you promise me something?" He asked quiet.

He felt her nod.

"Please never doubt, if I want you or not OK!? I always will!" He said honestly.

She brushed his shoulder with ones lips and whispered: "I promise!"

After these words both fell asleep.

"Jackson." April whispered. Jackson opened his eyes. "Jackson are you awake?" She hook him gently.

"Yeah" He said sleepy. "April... What's wrong!" He asked in concern caressing her hair. "Nothing... I just can't sleep. I can't stop thinking about your words and the things we have done... I can still feel your touch on my skin...all of me wants you Jackson." She nervously bit her bottom lip. By the memory of the moments they had shared, Jackson licked his lips, as if he would catch the taste again.

She grabbed his face and whispered: "I love you Jackson! I always have and I want you here and right now! We don't need a special moment... every moment with you... with us is special"

Jackson couldn't believe what he just heard...

"April..." He breathed out. "We didn't have to do this... I don't want you to regret it..." He whispered.

" But I want to!" She said and kissed him passionate. "I won't regret it!" She breathed in his ear. She sat up and slowly pulled her shirt off and was about to slid off the straps of her bra, when he asked: "Are you... are you sure Apes?"

"I have never been so sure in my life!" She answered. She straddled him and kissed him again with desire. Jackson didn't have no other choice than to capitulate. Without interrupting the kiss he opened her bra wiih just one move... April giggled under his lips, pulled back and tossed the unnecessary cloth away.

April was adorable... how she sat there... her face lightly blushed of pudency, but hey eyes sparkling with curiosity and arousal... she drove him insane... She just have to at him like this and he was her humble servant...caught in the vortex of desire... with every minute he spent with her, he'd fallen more and more for her magic and she had no idea how much power she had over him... As April felt unsure again, she tried to ignore it and kissed Jackson again.

Jackson lost his last sense of sanity, he had before; responded the kiss with the same arousal. He throw all his concerns aside and his hand went slowly to her backside and embrace it with his hands, and let himself fell into the sleeping sack with April underneath him. Now he laid above her and supported his weight with his forearms. He began to brush small kisses down her neck.

April sighed under his kisses. She wanted nothing else more than to feel him now.

Jackson couldn´t believe his luck... he thought he was dreaming...

At the moment he only wanted to cause April pleasure... It was unusual for him because he never had the experience with a virgin and he never thought he would like it::: but he loves to be Aprils teacher... Loved to be able to help her to experience her sexuality... To help her realized what caused her body lust and to explore herself in a whole different kind of way.. T o see herself different...He wanted her every second aware how beautiful she is and that she never gonna doubt it...

Slowly his lips slipped to her cleavage her hands followed the path of his lips and carefully enfold her well rounded breast, which perfectly fits in his hands, as they were made for it.

April closed her eyes to relished the feeling of his hands on her. It felt incredible. Everywhere he touched her, her skin prickled and her body hummed in pleasure. Now his lips replaced his hands. He nibbled gently on her pale, soft skin, before he took one of her sensitive nipple between his teeth, gently sucking at it. April let out a small shriek, by the surprise of his touch and how good it felt. Her eyes widened in surprise shock, but she instantly relaxed as the pleasant feeling came back. "Trust me Apes, don't be afraid... tell me if you don't like something..." He whispered and looked straight into her eyes.

"Uhuh." She was only able to respond and nodded. Her heart raced.

Jackson slowly explore her body again, trying to burn the memory of every inch of her body, in his mind. Her small enjoyable moans turned him even more on. He carefully began sucking on her nipple and circled his hot tongue around it. Her small sighs of enjoy fast changes in lustful moans. "Jackson." She gasp.

He kissed her hard in respond and fisting trough her hair.

"I want you!" She murmured in anticipation under his lips. He smirked and whispered in her ear, his voice full of awe: " Everything at the proper time...at first let me worship your body! " and gently nibbled her neck.

His words caused April to shiver and she felt a warm feeling settling between her thighs. His hands tenderly move to her upper thighs. It was delicate and floating. But April felt like her skin was on fire...but she didn't want it to stop!...Jackson was like gasoline... every time he touched her, the flame of desire blazed up again and she couldn't resist it... Jackson hand slid down to her flat belly, Her fingertips teasing her navel first and then playfully caressing her skin under the waistband of her black panty, watching her face the whole time. Within a moment, he repeated his action with his lips. He brushed floatingly kisses over her belly, upper thighs and durst forward to her inner thigh. When she didn't back off, he had the courage to gently nibble at her inner thighs. The feeling of his hot breath between her thighs, drove her insane...

"Jackson took your clothes off!" She gasped. The urge for him was almost unbearable... she wanted to feel as much of him as she could... Jackson smilied smiled smugly between her legs and said: "You have to wait... I am not even done with you!" and seductively bit her inner thighs . "I didn't even start!" He whispered. April moaned in respond. His experienced Hands, softly pulled the last fabric down which covered her body down. Now she was laying pure, naked, beneath him. His body hovering hers. He took a minute to admire the sight of her beneath him... to burn this sight into his mind... to relish the great feeling to feel her naked underneath him... she was so fucking beautiful!... He thought. He looked over her face and saw the slight fear in her eyes.

"Hey." He breathed softly and cupped her face with one hand. Forcing her to look at him.

"Am I to fast...? Do you want to stop?" He asked genuinely with empathy. She shook her head and blushed. He gave her a questioning look. "I't is just... no one ever seen me naked..." She tried to avoid his gaze and blushed even more. "I don't know if you like what you see or if I will doing things right... I have never done this before... " She rambled and nervuosly bit down her lip. He still couldn't understand that she had such a low self esteem...

He grinned and shook his head in disbelieve. If she didn't believe his words, he had to show her. He leaned over her and rubbed himself against, so she was able to feel his hard erection and how ready he was for her... all of him craved for her.. his hands eager to touch her and his dick throbbed to be inside of her. How could she didn't even see that...? "

Does this feel like I didn't want you?" He asked with a lustful voice, his eyes darker then ever. April grinned triumphallly and said: "But I still don't what I am supposed to do... What you like? I don't want to disappoint you!" She whispered.

"You coldn't ever disappoint me and trust me you will see it if I like something" He answered, smirked s and kissed herwith all he had. While he tried to smooth her with soft kisses. She relaxed under him: So his hands slowly stroke her inner thighs and lighly caressed her folds with his fingertips. He could feel that she was already wet... God how he wanted to be inside her... he thought and shudder. He slowly began two massage her in a slowly, circling motion and felt her pulsing against his fingers.

She quivered by his touch and sighed. She never felt something like that... she felt the heat built up trough her body again settling between her legs. Her need for him was undeniable now. She needed him... want him... more than anything she ever wanted... Jackson looked at her face... he saw the upcoming desire in her eyes and how she also fought against it...

"Do you like that April?" He only got a moan as answer. But that was enough approval for him. Carefully he slid one finger inside of her slowly moved it in a come here motion.

"Oh god Jackson!" She groaned.

He intensify his movements, added one finger inside her and stroke her clit with slight pressure. She arched her back, grabbed the fabric of the sleeping sack and whimpered. Aprils entire body hummed in pleasure. He felt her inner walls tighten around. Her hips buckling against his hand, urging him to continue. "

Your amazing April... let it go..." He whispered above her. He could see that she was close. April felt like her whole body was on fire and she might die if he ever stop. Her body consumed wave after wave of pleasure...then Jackson stroke a few time on her clit. She felt her inner walls stretched and pulsing around his hand and she thought she might explode, if Jackson don't gave her a release...

"Jackson... please..." She whimpered in desperate pleasure.

"I know... come for me April." And massage her clit. These few strokes and his words were enough to let her fall over the edge. Her hips buckled, she quivered. She moan his name, dug her heels into the sleeping back and bit her lip to suppress the urge to scream in release.

Jackson smiled, she looked so amazing while she was experiencing her first orgasm.

After she came down from her high, Jackson laid beside her, kisses her collarbone and asked:

"Was that Okay?"

She laugh breathlessly and said "Thar was amazing...thank you..."

He rolled over her, hovering her with his body, supporting his weight on his under arms. He kissed her lazy and looked her deep in the eyes.

"You were amazing April!" He whispered huskily, his eyes dark with lust.

She asked quiet: "Do you not want to take your clothes off either?"

He smiled "You know what? You are maybe right!" He stood up and took his boxers off.

Aprils eyes widened in shock as she saw his big, really big erection. "Jesus!" She whispered.

"No, Jackson." He chuckled and climbed above her.

"It is just... well... I have seen plenty of men... I am a surgeon though... but this.. this is really..." Before she could continue rambling Jackson kissed her hard. Aprils hands wandered to his muscular back. She loved the feeling of his tensing muscles under her fingers. She grabbed his backside and felt how his hard errection pressed against her thigh. They kissed for a while and their tongues met passionately. As April couldn't resist anymore, she pulled back and whispered breathless: "Jackson, I didn't want to wait anymore... I need you... I want you..." She reached between their bodies and carefully took his length into her small hand, because she wanted to give him the same pleasure, as he did it before. As he felt her hand wrapped around him, he hissed sharp for air and breathed out:

"April..." He softly took her hand in his. April looked confused at him.

"Do you don't want me to touch you?"

"Oh of course I want." His voice husky of lust He looked at her. "I want to enjoy the moment as long as I can... to be inside of you...If you keep doing this it won't last long... "

She held her breath. Then he leaned to her ear and whispered. "I want to be inside of you when I come..." She blushed and nodded.

There were no going back now. But she didn't want to. She was ready... she wanted it... she trusted Jackson...She only wanted to feel him now. In silence Jackson searched for permission to went further,,, he grabbed for his trousers and grabbed out a condom, ripped it out of the package and rolled it over his penis. Now he laid above April again. He looked at her, cupped her face and asked: "Are you really sure? we don't have to do this..."

Just him asking this question now warmed Aprils heart.

"Yes." She breathed, took his face between his hands and kissed him. Jackson placed himself into the right position. His tip prodded on her entrance. April shivered in anticipation and nerves.

"This might hurt a bit." He whispered.

She nodded and gave him a small smile. Their gaze remained as he slowly entered her.

April felt a sharp pain. She let out a small shriek and shut her eyes and waited until the pain eased. "I am so sorry." He said and cupped her face with one hand, caressing her cheek. He stood still, so she had the chance to adjust to him. The urge to fill her completely was almost excruciating. She felt so good.

"Breath love, it gets better... I promise..." He brushed her lips softly. April nodded and began to relax.

"You feel so incredible..." he breathed in her ear and laid his forehead on hers.

Jackson noticed that she relaed and began to move in a slowly pace.

After a while the pain was override with passion. Jackson let out small groans of pleasure while he moved in her slowly.

Now the pain was fully erased and April was overwhelmed with the fire arousal, closed her eyes and let her head fell back. She moaned his name and her hips began to move in sync. Met his rhythm. She felt that she was close. He felt it too.. He felt her inner walls clenched...

"Jackson" she moaned and closed her eyes. She felt his hand on her cheek.

"Don´t... Look at me April... Please.." He whispered, his eyes begging and full of desire. He reached between her legs and stroke her clit.

"Come for me April..." He whispered huskily. Than she finally fell over the edge and the waves of ecstasy overrides her. Her hips buckled, she arched her back and screamed his name as she got her release. To see April be overrode with her second orgasm, turned Jackson so much on that he needed only a few more thrusts to find his wn release.

"Oh fuck April" he let out guttural groan.

"Jackson... Jackson... Jackson.."

It seems like her Voice was far away and he felt that something shook his shoulder and ripped him out of the moment.

"Jackson, wake up, wake up Jackson!" The shook gets harder and the voice gets more panic and louder. He opened his eyes and groaned in frustration, when he realized that it was just a dream. "Fuck..." He cruised into his pillow. He couldn´t even describe his frustration in the moment.

"That just can´t be true..." He said and let out a laugh of unbelief.

"What´s wrong Jackson, did you have a nightmare again? You screamed my name the whole time... It was just a dream Jacks, I am´here, nothing happened to me!" J

ackson set up a little bit and laughed amused. "No, it was just the opposite." He said. Then he noticed that his blanket slit aside and noticed what kind of huge morning wood he had. He tried to hide it quickly by changing his position. But April did already noticed it and was clearly embraced. "Oh.." She breathed out.

"Yeah, you even haunting me in my dreams..." He whispered. April cracked a smile and blushed.

"I think I´m gonna make coffee" She stuttered, stood up and left the tent. Why she is embarrassed now...? Jackson asked himself... Of cause it is embarrassing... but mostly for me and not for her... He thought... Stood up and began to dress himself.

He could really used a cold shower now... Today there where going back home. Back to the daily routine. He wonder if things will be different at home. He wouldn´t wished it because he couldn´t imagine a live without April beside him and couldn´t say it loud t everyone. But he didn´t know how April thought about their situation now. Maybe she couldn´t handle it and that´s why she always gets so embarrassed when he showed her how she affects him. He had honestly no clue. April sat outside at the fire place, heating water for the coffee. She didn´t know,why she was so flustered. She was aware that a man could had a wet dream... But she never thought a man could have one of her... She didn´t knew how to handle it in front of Jackson. Did it mean that he had expectations now, that she couldn´t give him at least for now...? Than why he had rejected her last night? Her thoughts were interrupted, as she saw Jackson beside her. "Hey!" he said and placed himself beside her in the grass.

"The water is just ready!" She said with high pitched voice. He laid a hand on her leg.

"April, I´m sorry. I didn´t want to embraced you.." "No, no... It is just fine... It is human.." She rambled. Jackson know her all to well, to know that it wasn´t fine.

"April, than why you can´t even look at me?"

She looked up and nervously bit down her lip. "It just... I never thought... That anyone would have a wet dream about me...ever..." She reddened immediately. She nervously played with her hair "And I mean... this is also new for me... I don´t know what you expect.. of course you expect something from me... You are a man... and I simply don´t know, if I´m able to satisfy your expectations." She gestured nervously with her hands. "Because I have my principles, that I could throw so easily away for you and that scares me... I also know, that you not the guy who waits until marriage and that I didn´t expect it of you but I wanted to wait."

Jackson smiled and said soft: " April..." to get to speak but without success. She didn´t stopped rambling.

"The problem is that you make feeling me things, that I never experienced before and that i´m not even sure know if I wan´t to wait..."

"April..." He tried again but she spoke further. "The problem is that I have feelings for you, Jackson...Yes, I even love you... And I don´t know where it will takes me.. takes us... What do you want from me...? What I want from me even..? I just don´t want to screw things up like i´m always do."

"April you didn´t screw things up.."

Before he could go further, she gestured wild with her arms and respond: "Oh, I screw up pretty much things. I kill of patients... I´m annoying... weird … have a squeaky voice that everyone drove nuts. I didn´t have a boyfriend until now, because no one wanted to look at me and than you come along... The good looking lovely guy, who gets friends with me and suddenly now even says that he is in love with me and I have no clue why... I mean look at me" She gestured between them. "And than look at you."

Jackson didn´t know if he heard it right in her hectic speech but did she really say she love him...? His heard began to race by this thought.

"April, I look at you, even more than you think." He stepped closer to her. She stepped one back. He stepped one step closer and said with a smugly grin:" And in my dream I have seen all of you..."

His eyes rake over her body. " … and I liked it a lot!" He stepped one step closer again.

Now she felt the trunk behind her.

"I expect nothing from you but as you said, i´m a man and i´have wishes and desires... and one of them is to feel you naked underneath me but it doesn´t mean that I didn´t respect you... your principles... that I didn´t respect you...I would never push you to anything and I didn´t expect anything, I just want to be with you, because I know you are the one for me that without you I´m incomplete." As he said that out loud, he understand some things nowBut couldn´t think about it because April jumped him with a hot kiss.

As she ended the kiss, she took his face in her hands and asked: " Jackson, did it mean, we are gonna try?"

Jackson smiled and pact her lips and responded:" Yeah we are gonna try and i´m sure it´ll gonna be great, but I think we have to pack things and go home now,the daily routine calls."

"You´re right, I´ll go inside, grab my things and than we can go."

"I need to do some calls but than we can leave." As April disappeared in the tent, he grabbed his I phone and called Mark. After two dial tones, marks voice called on the other line.

" AverY my son, how you two love birds doing out there? Are you heading home? I need you for some operations and Hunt is already flipping out here"

"Yes, we drive home today, we´re on call but I call you, because I need your help."

"What is it, Avery?" "I want propose to April."

"Avery, I´m impressed. You finally got balls, so you finally took my advise, well done boy! So spill out, what are you imagine?"

"I would want to propo se to her on your wedding!"

"That´s in four weeks... you know that, right?"

"Yes, but I´ve never been so sure in my life, that she is the one and I just didn´t want to waste more time." Jackson could felt marks triumphal grin through the phone. "

Well, than come back, so we can start our secretly plastic posses mission. I´m your man!"

With a smile on his face, Jackson hung up and went to April in the tent, which was closing the bags now.

"Hey, " he said softly."

"Hey!" She answered. "We can leave, if you want!"

"Yeah, lets go back to the retinue!" He said, a little bit sad. "Although I didn´t wanna leave this place"

"Jackson, patients needs us, you have to think about it!"

"Yeah, you are right, than let´s leave." Jackson was sad but he also knew, that he went back into a different daily routine... A daily routine with April... The woman of his life besides him. He want the whole damn thing, that he was sure about.


	5. I love everything about you!

**Hey lovelies:) To make up for the delay of the last Chapter... here is the next:) Thank you for all that Followed/Favorite/reviewed my story! I really appreciate it a lot. As always, tell me what you think:) I hope you like it:)**

 **All characters belong to Shonda**

Chapter 5

 **I love everything about you**

As they arrived at home, they pack out their bags and recalled the past few days.

April still couldn't believe that Jackson and her were a couple now... It was like a dream and she was scared to woke up... Her long last best friend was in love with her and she had to admit, she was it, too. She put the bikini out of the bag, lightly touching the fabric.. and smiled. She had never felt so free... so alive... and so beautiful like in those past few days.

Suddenly two strong arms wrapped her from behind and pulled her closer. Jackson brushed a kissed into her copper hair. She immediately relaxed against him and leaned on him.

"Too bad that our vacation is over now... it was wonderful!" He said quiet.

"Yeah it seems like it was dream and I am afraid to wake up..." She answered.

Jackson smiled and pinched her soft.

"Ouch" She said. "What was that for?" She asked him.

" You see! You fully awake... No dream!" He said and chuckled.

She smiled, turned around to face him and said "I wonder what the others will say about us?!" "What should they have to say? We are a couple now. For the most of them it was merely just a matter of time, anyway!" He answered.

" You are probably right. But I can just imagine they bothering me with million teasing questions about my sex life" She chuckled amused.

He chuckled And pecked her lips. " It 'll all figure our April, don't worry!"

"Will you sleep in my bed tonight?" She asked and wondered how easily they switched into this _"couple being attitudes"_

"Of course I can!" He answered.

They were about to went upstairs, as suddenly their pagers beeped. An emergency. They couldn't ignore it...

"Urgh I thought we are feel today...cheered to soon... duty calls." April said.

"Then lets go!" Jackson answered and they drove to the hospital.

As they arrived they saw the mess in the ER... April was searching for Hunt, to asked him what was going on and where he could use some helping hands.

Jackson searched for Mark.

April found Hunt and asked: "What happened? How can I help."

"A shooting at the High School, 17 Injured. 7 of it are in a critical state!" Hunt informed quickly. Memories rushed trough her mind... not long ago... she barely escaped the death in the shooting as well...She still could clearly remember the words she said as she faced the death... These

words saved her to not get shot by Gary Clark. She remembered the word as if it were yesterday...

 _My name is April Kepner. I am 28 years old. I am from Columbus, Ohio. My mum is a teacher and my das is a farmer He grow up corn. I have 3 sisters. Libby, Kimmy and Alice. I haven't done anything vet. I barely lived. I am not finished yet. No one's loved me yet. Please! I m a Person."_

She heard her words in her head. If she didn't have told him her half life story, she might be dead now... She would never received love and could never give love like now...She rushed beside Owen and put on gloves. Owen was about to reanimate the patient: "Charge to 200... and... go... we have a Rhythm, lets get to the OR!" In the OR it all went fast and in a rush.

"There is so much blood I can't see anything... suction please... Cristina... help me here...clamp please now! Yes I finally got the bleeding under control!" April said.

Then Richard Webber entered the OR and asked: "How does it going?"

"I the bleeding under control. He is stable!"

"Ben. What hair color does the patient have?" Dr. Webber asked.

" Red, Dr. Webber. Why do you asking?" Ben questioned.

"Because he is the shooter..." Dr. Webber answered.

All looked up in disbelief. They were in a dispute with their professional ethics now...their profession was to save live... no matter what... and no matter who laid on the OR table... but the remembrance of the shooting was still so fresh, that they all freeze for a moment.

After a while they said "Lets continue!"

-All- except April.

"Kepner?" Hunt said soft. "Lets continue!" He repeated.

But she couldn't move... she was aware that she had to finish operating... but she couldn't...She tried her hands to order to function...but couldn't...all she could think about right now, was the shooting... how she stumbled over Reed's dead body and was covered in Reed's blood...Apathetically she stepped back until she felt the wall behind her and slid to the ground. She wrapped her knees with her hands and shook herself in a hypnotic motion. She murmured over and over again: "There was so much blood... Reed...So much blood..."

Cristina, which well to good understood in what state April was now, whispered to the OR nurse: Go, get Avery and hurry up!"

Dr Webber tried to talk to April... but she didn't respond, She was caught in the shock. No words go through her.

"Dr. Avery can you come with me? It is an Emergency and urgent!" The OR Nurse said, when she entered the other OR.

"I am quiet busy here... you have enough hand in the other OR... I can't leave Dr. Sloan." Jackson said.

"That is not the matter... it is because of Dr. Keppner! Plaese Sir you have to hurry!" The OR nurse answered.

He Froze, He looked up at Mark, his eyes widen in shock. Mark only nodded in agreement and Jackson left the OR with the nurse.

"Dr. Kepner is in a shock state... Dr. Yang told me to get you..." The OR nurse explained.

They entered the other OR.

His heart stopped a second and was nearly ripped. As he the sight of April .

"What the hell happened?" He asked.

"We are operating on the shooter and then she sudden was in this state..." Webber explained.

Slowly Jackson sat down on the floor, besides her and tried to took her softly in his arms and sooth her.

She murmured the same words all over again; without recognizing hon: " There was blood... so much blood..." She whispered and her whole body quivered.

"April... hey... sssshhhh..." He whispered soft and wrapped his arms around her. "All is fine... I am here April...look at me April... Please try to look at me sweetheart..." He whispered in her ear, stroking her hair.

She finally looked up at him. Her eyes empty.

"Jackson... Reed... I can't do anything... so much blood... I can't do anything..." Jackson gulped it cost him all his will power, to not burst out into tears right now.

"it is over April...all is fine now..." He tried to sooth her further.

"I don't want to die, Jackson..." She whispered in fear.

"What are you talking, love." He gently took her hand in his and carefully guided it to her breast, so she could feel her heartbeat."You see! You live! Do you feel your heartbeat?" He asked.

She nodded lethargically.

"Come April, lets go out of here... lets go outside... can you do that for me sweetheart?" He helped April to get up from the floor and was glad that she could stay on her feet now.

"There you go love... we are almost outside..." He whispered, glanced over his shoulder, nodded thankful and left the OR with April

"Good girl... Come April... lets get you out of this clothes and drive home … OK?

"Jackson I almost died and I couldn't tell you that I love you... " Her lip trembled and her eyes watered. "I haven't tell you..." She cracked out and sobbed bitterly, what Jackson appreciated for once. Because she wasn't in a apathetic state anymore. He pulled her onto his chest, caressed her hair.

"Of course you have... didn't you remember?" He asked and smiled.

She shook her head.

"Today at the camping place... and you will have many chances to say it again... if you want to..." He said and kissed her temple.

She cried hard on his chest but nodded. "I couldn't continue operate... I couldn't..." She told him between sobs. "My hands just stunned...and suddenly... all I could see was blood and Reed... dead on the floor..."

" It is OK babe! Nobody judges you for that! It is alright!"

As she calmed down he asked: " Do you need any help to change...?

"No I can do it by myself..." She answered. He looked deep into her eyes, for some assurance. "Good, then I will go to Mark and tell him, that I go home with you! I'll be right back!" He kissed her forehead.

April nodded, went to the changing room and Jackson went to Sloan.

"Mark I had to go home...You have to manage without me..."

"What?!... Why?!" Mark asked

. " April is in a shock state! I have to take care of her!" Jackson said.

"Oh of course... call me if you need , my son!" Mark said in empathy.

"Are we meeting tomorrow for our secret mission?" Mark asked and grinned in excitement under his mask.

"Yeah, we do and no word to anybody!" Jackson said. "You have my word son! The plastic posses are back" Mark said.

Meanwhile at the OR

"Owen did you know about pretty boy and virgin Mary? Are they a couple now?" Cristina said.

"I knew as little as you did...but it seems so...but it great... that they found each other... I am happy for Kepner." Owen said.

"But what about Kepners super powers...because as soon he gets in her pants, she lost her super powers! " Cristina said. "Cristina..." Owen sigh and rolled his eyes.

A few minutes later in Jackson and Aprils House

Jackson took a blanket, carefully cover her shoulders with it and handed her a glass of Rosé.

"Are you felling any better babe?" He asked in concern.

"Yes, thank you for coming in the OR!"

"Of course Apes!" He answered. She smiled and leaned her head on his shoulder.

He wrapped an arm around her and pull her closer to him.

"April what was going in there? Can you tell me about it" He asked soft.

"The patient was the shooter." She began.

"Then the memories came back and it overwhelmed me... and then I only saw blood and the dead body of Reed... and Gary Clark... how he pointed the gun on me.. I have told my whole life story... and he let me run... I have told him that I barely have lived... that I never have loved... until now..." She told him.

By the thought that he almost have had lost April his chest tightened painfully.

"Can we go to sleep now Jackson?" She asked.

He stood p went upstairs with her.

"Jackson do you stay in my room tonight, please?"

"I already planned!" He said and pecked her lips. Jackson cradled in her bed with her with his boxers on. He spooned her from behind , wrapping his arms around her.

"I love you Jackson. She whispered and turned her face to him.

"I love you, too! He said and kissed hher tenderly.

"Try to get some sleep, love. Tomorrow is another day to safe lives." He said, kissed her hair and embraced her.

He wanted to give her a feeling of safe and he never wanted to let her go.

All he wanted was to protect her, to love her. She was the most emotional, selfless person that he ever known.

He was never so sure about something. He couldn't imagine to live only one day without her.


End file.
